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How to understand whether a wife is indifferent to her ex-husband. Indifferent wife




Sometimes even trusting and strong relationships between spouses, lasting for several years, give a leak.

This is due to misunderstandings and “unexpectedly” disagreements in family life.

Not every woman withstands the indifference of a loved one in relation to herself. If the husband has cooled off to you, take note of the techniques that we will tell you about in this article.

Signs of indifference!

But in the “candy-bouquet” period everything was so fabulous and beautiful: you were sought and extolled to heaven! What happened now: what is the reason for these omissions and regular grunts?

The main signs that your beloved husband has cooled to you:

  • Forgotten Tenderness

The first alarm bell should come already if the beloved regularly “forgets” about his touching and gentle habits such as kisses in the ear and hugs before bedtime.

At best, he gets off with a cold-blooded " good night”, At worst - demo turns to the wall and instantly falls asleep. Of course, you can be reassured by excuses about age, problems at work, excessive fatigue, but subconsciously you still guess that this is not the reason ...

  • Lack of jealousy

Quite often, the question “The husband has cooled down to me, what should I do?” Is asked by the wives, whose lovers cease to be jealous of the men around them. If the spouse notices about your departure “for dinner with girlfriends” only when you have already returned from him, this is a significant reason to think about his sincere relationship.

  • No interest

If your husband is not interested in your business at work, and he himself is constantly silent, when you ask about his career successes (although such topics were traditional for you before) do not miss this moment! Any cardinal change in his everyday behavior should alert you.

  • Indifference

The previously inexhaustible supply of beloved eloquence is minimized, especially during a difficult period for you, for example, during pregnancy. He no longer sees a new hairstyle or a seductive dress that you bought specially for him, does not make compliments, or speaks them intentionally so that he is not forced to go to the store again.

  • Discontent and criticism

Regular complaints are expressed about everything that you do: whether it's taking care of children or cooking, washing or cleaning, - all this becomes the subject of heated debate and reproaches against you.

What if the husband got cold to you, and every day ends in terrible scandals? It is necessary to take emergency ways to eliminate the problem and preserve love. Of course, if the spouse is still dear to you.

The return of feelings!

All the above points do not occur without reason. Do you think that your man alone is to blame? You are mistaken! Both opponents are guilty of the dispute, and only the wise of these two can put the “train of love” on a new footing of relations.

Asking the question “what to do if the husband has cooled off to me”, the woman does not always understand that she herself is the reason for this behavior of her husband. Reluctance to take care of oneself, excessive jealousy, excessive coldness and so on - all this can completely redraw the beloved, who is horrified to realize that he is not familiar with you, since he married absolutely “different” woman.

If you really want to regain former feelings, change your behavior:

  • Take care of yourself!   You should remember this moment forever: the image of a disheveled wife in a terrible dressing gown can disappoint her beloved. This is especially true for the period after childbirth: it does not matter whether you go to a fitness club or do exercises at home - restore your fitness!
  • Do not throw tantrums and do not let depressive states. The husband should see his support in you and feel round-the-clock support. Do not cry: tears can destabilize even the most durable relationships, plus everything, they spoil your appearance.
  • Frequently run a marafet: Let beauty and massage parlors be your friends.
  • Do not complain about spouse to girlfriends: do not allow the removal of the "quarrel from the hut." No husband will tolerate this!
  • Be interested in your beloved: show your sincere interest, talk, offer to spend time together. Do not be discouraged if you do not immediately meet the response, calm and support will gradually convince your husband of your sincerity and interest in him.

Rival?

If the reason for the husband’s coldness is another woman, let go of your spouse, do not console yourself with groundless hopes that you can return the love of a loved one by holding him. If he really loves you, he will return.

Psychologist’s advice in this matter touches upon deep points: realize that life will go on anyway, because you know that you are worthy of happiness! Feel the freedom and sincerely enjoy it.

By rebuilding yourself in a positive and joyful way, you will soon notice the admiring glances of others. And, who knows, maybe one of these men will be yours former spouse. Seeing you happy, he realizes that he has lost: and only the real development of the further situation depends on you.

If you have lost faith in the possibility of a successful relationship with an "enlightened" spouse, you should honestly admit it and leave his life forever. As a human being, wish him good luck, remember how much good things bound you before. Do not allow arrogance and cruelty, because he is not alone to blame for the separation.

If you still want to fight for his love, then take note of the above methods: they will help to establish a warm and trusting family relationships. Do not allow scandals, but most importantly - love yourself and support your husband.

And the most important advice

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I am extremely interested in the opinion from the outside about the situation in which I am already pretty tired of being. 10 years ago I got married, and at first everything was fine. There were children, and also everything was going well. My wife did not work, there was no money, but enough for our affairs and interests. The problem came later, almost imperceptibly, as usual, but still has not receded, for several years now. The wife has lost interest in life. No, not completely, but changed a lot. Everything annoys her, she sees in everything only the bad. Good, even if there is, as if not noticing. And she doesn’t care about everything. No, there are interests, hobbies, but she goes in cycles in them, and as if leaves for the parallel world. She is delighted when we go to the resort, watch movies, take a great interest in photos, but at the same time she is estranged from everyone and even from her family. She does not get to the things that could be connected with the family, with the development of herself in society.

The economy smoothly transferred everything to me, I drive children to school and I go to mugs, I even choose mugs for children, I also prepare, because otherwise the children will remain hungry. The child somehow got sick, the temperature is 41.3. I was worried, almost did not sleep, I applied all wet towels, and in the morning I just asked the kettle to turn it on. So no: "Well these are your children, why don’t you make them tea for yourself?" my wife asked me. I do not want to conflict with her when I am a child, but she refuses to do something on her own or at my polite request. If I speak more sharply, I get criticism that they say it’s also my children, my house, my family, and not only she should do this. But, she does almost nothing ...

No, I understand that there may be depression, frustration, and so on, but ... These are our children, she bore them, fed them, watered them. Out of love with me - okay, you can discuss. Although: "You still love me," I ask, he answers: "yes, of course, why do you doubt it." But children, what could they do wrong? Normal children, not yet at that age so that they could really suffer from them. They study well, not sick.

I'm lost. Attempts to talk translate into scandal, almost immediately. The offer to go to the doctor is rejected with foam at the mouth. Plus to this lately   (about a year) she began to get annoyed at everyone with whom she was talking. On me, children, my mom, my mom. After one of the conversations, her mother happened heart attack. Mom was accused of eating a potato cake bought for her. She blamed for a long time, screaming for about 30 minutes. Along the way, he made his mother guilty of everything. I tried to pull it, but also received a lot of different personal statements.

We have lost all the joint friends. I became the cause of attacks if I suddenly spend time not on her. I am forced to communicate even with my mother secretly, from work. I don’t stutter about my sister. With friends, there is almost no communication, and so things are up to the mark. Quite often, she began to give sick cuffs to children for the slightest offenses and occasional oversights. Children began to be afraid of her, they do not want to remain without me. Her hobby, photo, for example, remains with her. That is, she takes pictures, and looks at them herself. Shows me one or two a week. Children are simply driven away from their laptop.

She does not want to work. I said that, they say, maybe you need to fulfill your potential, but the answer is "no, and there are so many chores around the house." I could hardly stop laughing at that moment.

You might think she has someone, and she is stealthily forcing me to leave? But where do the children come from? And moreover, she knows very well that I am aware of all her personal affairs. Sometimes, at her request, I put things in order in her mail. She is lazy to deal with spam. And she definitely has no pages on social networks. I also control her financial flows. She looks healthy. Does not drink or smoke. There are no traces of injections and the smell of smoked dope either. Her parents and all the relatives I know are healthy in appearance.

Someone might think that maybe in bed she has been missing something all this time, but it seems that whenever she wants, everything comes to her complete satisfaction. I have never noticed any intimate problems.

Some friends say that I spoiled her. Like, trouble-free, ask, do it, it was necessary to be more strict, and now, like, disentangle. Of course, I can blame myself, but my question is not "who is to blame?", But "what to do?" Maybe he spoiled that he allowed me not to work. But initially, I did not intend to farm for her. Yes, she led. She said so: you work, you earn money, I am at home and with children. And she did everything, and, yes, I helped. Sometimes I’ll bake a cake, sometimes I’ll load the laundry into the washer. At the weekend we walked with the children. What is pampering? Here, I don’t go for other women and don’t drink beer, I don’t watch football, I don’t read newspapers on the couch, I don’t smoke. Maybe she lacks this? She grew up without a father for some time, even in poverty. Maybe longed? I'm not funny anymore.

If not for the children, I would have left. Definitely. But I cannot and do not want to leave children. And to expel his wife: it seems that she will not give up children in this situation. It seems to me that her psyche is moving somewhere, but how to make or persuade her to go to the doctor? Or how to do it discreetly? I wanted to pay a little more to the doctor so that he would come home, under the guise of my colleague, to discuss matters as if by chance and make up his own opinion about the situation, but: of course, my wife behaves a little better when visiting, and the saddest thing is that we have not there were guests. The wife does not want to see anyone in the house. If I bring it, it will no longer be imperceptible. I tried to talk in absentia, but all the doctors say only one thing: you need to talk to her directly.

Now I perceive her as an adult child. She, as an older mischievous sister, became for her own children. But I'm an adult, I will survive this, but the children. Indeed, apart from the back of the head, this can leave a very deep mark in their fragile psyche. I feel that both children and I have become hostages of this problem. I remember a fairy tale " The Snow Queen" ...

I am more and more inclined towards a radical decision. One day, after school, children quietly fly with them to another country and start all over from scratch. Technically, there may be a European residence permit. She also has, however, she can set off after. In this case, I will leave her an apartment and a car (without the right to sell, for the car is recorded on me, and in her apartment only 1/4, the rest is mine and the children equally), I am not a goon, but I will withdraw all the money from her accounts.

What to do?

The old feelings have gone somewhere, there is no tenderness, and sex with her husband is happening less and less. As if they had replaced a man, love seemed to have disappeared. Even the very existence of a family is in jeopardy. What to do if the husband has cooled?

Start by analyzing your relationship. Often the husband cools if the wife initially loved him less than he did her. At a certain stage, he began to realize that he was giving too much strength without receiving the proper return, the romantic halo evaporated and the husband remained with the understanding that his love was not mutual enough. A wife who is used to the position of a spoiled princess, usually experiences this situation rather painfully.

However, the more common case is when the wife, on the contrary, loves more and pays too much attention to her husband. He gets tired of her calls, guardianship and trouble - and begins to try to communicate less in order to somehow reduce the amount of desire directed at him. This is logical - I give you less attention, and you give me less attention. As a rule, very good women dissolve in a husband, and therefore they are especially sorry when they sincerely care - but they are rejected, tired of excessive attention.

Also, no matter how trivial, the reason for the cooling is that the woman's appearance has changed not for the better. Too many people want to relax after the wedding, too often women are confident in unearthly love   spouse. Love may remain after the wife crosses the centner mark on the scales, but in most cases the attraction suffers greatly. And men begin And if he doesn’t succeed with his wife, he can blame his wife for this and with a clear conscience go to the side. What to do if the husband walks and does not pay due attention?

You need to change yourself for the better, and the goal should not only be the improvement of external data. Yes, good fitness combined with reduced calorie intake will make you slimmer, but this alone is not enough. Excess weight is usually associated with disharmony. inner world, with a tendency to substitute food for all pleasant emotions, a definite stop in development. In order not to feel pain due to the inattention of the husband, you need to take your classes, you need to feel independent and successful. You must, within the framework of the possible, become a new personality, and not just return the beautiful contours. It’s good to find a young coach in the gym with a reputation who will show what to do. If the husband has cooled, you need to get more male attention. And in predominantly women's groups it is often very difficult to get support. Of course, this is impossible. You can intrigue a little, but there should not be real betrayal, because then the husband will easily leave you, you yourself will give him a good reason.

On the other hand, you can play a little with a sense of jealousy. Let the brothers of friends or other acquaintances of acquaintances seem to accidentally compliment you on the street and pay attention to the eyes of your husband. He must know that not only he needs you. It is very stimulating. There can be a lot of answers to the question: “What to do if the husband has cooled down”, but in order to really change your relationship, you must become a new person. So that he falls in love again. At the same time, it’s good to radically change the color of your hair and hairstyle, and for the time being it’s good to hide the figure in spacious clothes until you show him the final result of your efforts. Read more upscale literature, not detectives and women's novels, and classical Russian and foreign literature. After several weeks of daily reading, you will notice that your consciousness has become wider, you use other words and take a new look at the world.

There is another situation. It seems to you that your husband was bewitched. What to do in this situation? If his attitude has changed dramatically, this may be, in this case you need to try to persuade him to go to However, more often the attitude changes gradually and the witch has nothing to do with it. In no case do not contact the witch yourself with the question of what to do. If the husband has cooled, only you can save the family. Work on oneself and relationships. And no other way.