How to understand the guy's sincere feelings. Compliment or flattery. How to determine the sincerity of men




Many women see in the man they meet with not only a temporary partner, but also a life partner. They expect to marry him. If you are among these women, then you should check your partner for the sincerity of his feelings for you: is he really experiencing sincere feelings  and how serious his relationship is. Learn how to check the feelings of men.

Make him jealous

Try to evoke a feeling of jealousy from your man, the main thing is not to get carried away with this activity. Flirt in front of his eyes with a familiar man, or just kindly smile at a stranger. At the same time, it is necessary to monitor the reaction of your second half. If you are not indifferent to him, he will surely make a remark to you, and you will feel jealous of him. Recall once again that you do not need to flirt, because a simple test can lead to a serious quarrel.

Culture of behavior

It is also worth paying attention to whether he cares about you. Does it give you a hand when leaving the car, holds the door in front of you and helps to carry weights. The desire to help even in such trifles makes it clear that he really sincerely cares about you on a subconscious level. View your correspondence by e-mail or SMS messages. Here it is worth paying attention to how he finishes his messages. See if the words of love are present in them: “I kiss,” “embrace”, “miss”, “love”.

Familiarity with close surroundings

Try asking for a meeting with his friends. Remember that for any man the opinion of his environment is very important. Sometimes it even comes first. Therefore, if he is embarrassed to introduce you to his close environment, he is clearly not sure about his feelings, as well as the further development of your relationship. This means that he does not associate you as a real pair. Thinking how to check a man? Ask him to give you a small service, for example, to record a collection of music on a disc or movie. This will make it clear to you whether a man is ready to spend even a very small part of his personal time on you. In doing so, you need to monitor the result: if he remembers your request, and also how quickly it will fulfill it. If he completely forgot what you asked him for, it means that he is not ready to spend his free time on you.

Familiarity with the family

You should also pay attention to whether he introduces you to his relatives. At the initial stages of a relationship, as a rule, a man hides his other half from close people, because he himself cannot yet be sure of his feelings. It is clear that he is unlikely to want to acquaint the mistress with his parents, but can invite her to the company of friends in order to boast. But the man always starts to lead the candidate for the place of his future wife according to his friends and acquaintances, as well as his brothers and sisters, eventually presenting her to his parents. This may mean that his feelings are quite stable and definite.

View from the outside

You can also ask your girlfriend with your boyfriend or spouse to join you in going to the cinema, theater or restaurant. Let her carefully observe his behavior. She will need to point out if he respects you and if he gives you any invisible signs of attention. A good friend knows you far from the first day and will be able to tell you all the comments and conclusions made by her. Remember that from the outside, it is always more visible how harmoniously the couple looks and what kind of relationship between partners reigns in their relationship. Do not know how to check the feelings of a man? Look at his attitude and communication with other women. When a man is truly truly in love and has serious intentions, he stops communicating with all other women. He keeps the number of contacts with them to a minimum. In this case, even friends of the opposite sex lack communication with him, as he is completely absorbed in his second half. This is the main indicator that a man chose you; now you can reduce your “checks” to a minimum.

INTRODUCTION

You are incredibly happy, it seems to you that you are an ideal couple, time passes unnoticed next to your beloved. Feelings overwhelm you, but remember that love brought you from reality to the world of dreams and fantasy. Often, lovers can not adequately respond to the events around them. And after a while, your cloudless happiness dims - a treacherous thought comes to mind: “Do I love or is it a fiction, a deception? And do I want to be further with this man and is that the fairy-tale prince I dreamed of as a child? ”

If you have doubts about the truth of your feelings and feelings of your love, then do not worry - this is not the end of a relationship, but going to new stage. You just need to catch your breath a little and look sober at yourself and your partner. Perhaps it is better to stop now, so that later it would not be excruciatingly painful. Even if it seems impossible, you need to overcome your fears and fears and think about the future.

In the old days, our great-grandmothers and great-grandfathers were not even familiar with the wedding, such doubts were unknown to them. Now we can not understand how they managed to live together a lifetime. In the modern world we have become accustomed to the fact that even a long acquaintance of the wedding does not save from divorce. Therefore, before you take the responsible step to create a family, you need to make sure that you have the right choice. Well, let's start!

LOVES OR NO - HERE IN WHAT QUESTION

Rule number 1

Oh, those tenderness, or Kiss - the best proof of the sincerity of feelings

Nothing more accurately expresses the feelings of your chosen one, like his kiss. A kiss is the impulse of a lover who is eager to touch the object of passion. Lovers are able to kiss tirelessly: the duration of their kissing is not affected by the environment, or the garlic salad just eaten.

Try to appreciate the sincerity of your partner's kiss. It is very easy. To do this, conduct a small "study". Find out who is usually the initiator of the kiss - you or your partner? Does he want to kiss for no reason? Usually, lovers accompany any event that occurred in their lives with a kiss: this is the usual way of expressing gratitude (instead of the word “thank you,” which we say to the people around, lovers thank each other with a kiss, for example, a prepared dinner).

Observe how your chosen one expresses his gratitude and how often he does it. With a kiss, lovers wake up and fall asleep, meet and forgive. In most cases, they have an unreasonable desire to touch their loved one. Can you say the same thing about your sweetheart?

Then pay attention to how you usually kiss. There are a lot of types of goals, but in practice we use only a few of them - those that give us the greatest satisfaction. Try to determine which type of kiss your partner will most like. Remember how often you kiss in public places.

When “counting the votes”, do not be too strict, it is known that men are much more restrained in expressing their feelings than women. If you, having made such observations, noticed that your chosen one often acts as an object of your caresses and harmful cases as an initiator, if he mostly tries to dodge long kisses, if he is embarrassed to show his feelings in public places, then you shouldn’t immediately blame his sincerity. It is possible that he is simply stingy in the manifestation of his feelings and does not like at all, or does not even know how to kiss. In your power to change his attitude to the kiss.

It is known that a kiss is not just a pleasant activity, but also useful. A few years ago, scientists established that a long, passionate kiss has healing power. It improves blood supply to the brain, in addition, special substances, the so-called "hormones of happiness", are released into the bloodstream, which not only improves one's mood, but also makes a person feel light and cheerful. Try to diversify your caresses and with a familiar smacking, barely touch the lips of your beloved. It will be more like a whiff of the wind than a kiss, but it will surely cause pleasant emotions. Your standard french kiss is replaced by a more passionate kiss with lip biting. And be sure to always take care of the freshness of the oral cavity, which is also important when creating a favorable atmosphere for your loved one. Such changes will certainly have a positive effect on your partner.

Rule number 2

"These eyes are opposite ...", or What does his look say?

Did you pay attention to how the eyes of lovers shine at the sight of their sighs? In the eyes of a truly in love person, a spark lights up, as if a heart fire is reflected, which burns inside.

At the time of balls and social events about the birth of a new feeling spoke exactly look. There was even a whole sistemaznakov, with the help of which lovers in their eyes guessed each other's feelings. Such a system has long sunk into oblivion. A lover can still be calculated by burning eyes.

How to understand what his view means? Are there any signs by which one can determine the gaze of a man in love? Unfortunately, with 100% accuracy it is impossible to determine what he feels like in the eyes, because no one has yet invented a scale of views, which could be used to distinguish the look of a lover from a friendly look, a look of true passion from a sight of affection. To characterize the view of a man in love, we use the most different definitions  - “open-hearted”, “shrill”, “passionate”, “peaceful”, “happy”, “blissful”, “dumbfounded”. Here are just a few of the possible characteristics of the lover’s gaze, in fact, much more.

Do not rush to draw conclusions, if your loved one's eyes do not shine as they should. Sometimes a fire burns in the eyes of a lover that is difficult not to be noticed by others. But it also happens that a glance only slightly gives the owner of a strong feeling. It depends on many indicators - on the color of the eyes: brown (dark) eyes are more expressive and give out the feelings of their owner more quickly, light blue, gray - a less accurate indicator, it’s harder to find out about them; on the type of temperament: in the eyes of extroverts (choleric and isngviniks) it will be easier to recognize their feelings, but in the eyes of the inverters (melancholic and phlegmatic) you may not find any evidence of the presence of any feelings.

If you have not found a spark in your beloved's eyes, do not despair. It is better to pay attention to how often and how long your elect will look at you. It is no secret that lovers can “eat” each other for hours with their eyes. For lovers, visual contact is a vital necessity. No wonder the object of adoration is called beloved - it is simply impossible to peer and look. But if your chosen one more often considers short skirts passing by girls than he admires you, then it is worth thinking about it: most likely, his feeling for you is not as strong as you would like.

Rule number 3

Bird, fish, my little hare ... Or how he refers to you

For lovers, inventing sweet names for the subject of sighs is almost a prerequisite for their communication. In this they are very similar to small children: kids who have just learned to speak also love to experiment and come up with the most ridiculous words. Lovers of them do not lag behind - Kozyavochka, Buka, Pusya, Kutya, etc.

Watch your lover. Does he often use such affectionate nicknames? If he is truly in love with you, then you should get the impression that he simply has few unusual words to express his feelings. This is quite a normal phenomenon for people who adore each other. Coming up with new and new names for their chosen ones, they are trying to secede from the rest of the rest of the world and consolidate the property right to their chosen one. After all, their love is equivalent to the great discovery in the world of science, invention, which has turned the world around. That is why it requires its own, not like anything else.

You can come up with a variety of names. One of my friends, a loving couple, Masha and Vanya, called each other only as Mashulka and Vanya, and they also added a word to each of these pet names. For example, Mashulka-pot (Masha is preparing dinner), Mashulka-watching (Mashasmotrit her favorite series), Vanya-voruzhka (Vanya hungry), Vanya-smorkushka (Vanya caught a cold), etc. each his own way of addressing the beloved man, it all depends on your imagination and on conditional agreement with your friend.

You believe that such appeals are not at all the obligatory attribute of the communication of lovers and that it is much more convenient to call each other simply affectionate names. Vanechka and Masha - and at the hearing, and not so sweetly. But lovers, as a rule, insist on our particular language. For example, Masha, before meeting with Vanya, was sure of the one hundred percent that she would definitely do without any “musi-pusi” there and would call her beloved only by name. Now, having met Vanya, she calls him Ivan only for naturers or when she is very angry.

If you notice that your beloved doesn’t bother too much, coming up with original messages for you, if he likes to call you simply Masha rather than a kitten or chick, do not doubt the strength of his feelings and do not blame the lack of affection. It is a rare case of a man in love who does not attach much importance to gentle chars and is much more comfortable and more comfortable for him to call you by name.

Rule number 4

A bouquet of flowers with or without, or Do you make surprises?

Have you ever received a bouquet of flowers from your lover just like that, for no reason? Not on a birthday, not on the Eighth of March, not after a strong quarrel, but on an ordinary weekday, when the weather is fine, the sky is blue, the birds are filled with inspiration, in flower booths there are roses, gladioli, chrysanthemums, and in the hands of your loved one bouquet of bluebells. From where

Women in the blood need to receive gifts. They simply conceal when their beloved gives something, but without prejudice: “I’ll have a cool mobile for you on your birthday, and you’ve given me Chanel number 5. Going?” No, much more interesting receive unexpected gifts when they are not welcome, when you are well without him, and with him - twice as good. It is not difficult for a man in love to go out of town and pick bells in the field not because there is no money, but because his dearly madly loves these bells, but they are not sold anywhere. It is not difficult for a lover to get up at six o'clock in the morning to cook breakfast, despite the fact that he doesn’t know how to cook, but in order to get a surprise, he asked his mother how to whip the cream, and bought some fresh strawberries.

If this is not for your chosen one, then you should think about it: is your lover really in love with him or is he just playing and depicts a sincere feeling? Lovers are so arranged that they have only one thing in mind - how to double, triple and increase the portion of the happiness of a loved one.

In order to find out if your beloved is sincere with you, try experimenting: is he ready to surprise you? Just don’t ask directly - I want flowers or breakfast in bed. For a start hint to him that you are not averse to receiving an unexpected gift: rejoice in abundance flowers on the streets of the city, envy the girl with a bouquet in your hands, drag your young man to a romantic melodrama with Richard Gere, who will teach your beloved a lesson in the conquest of women's hearts, try to gently mention your passion to white lilies or wildflowers. If your precious figure out what all these hints are for, and will give you a long-awaited bouquet, then congratulations - he passed a test of the strength of his feelings, but if not, then perhaps he simply does not feel so passionate for you that you expect from him, or just can not express it.

Try also to assess the degree of originality of your beloved. A lover should strive to surprise you with something, present a gift that you have never received, or do it in some original way. You noticed that he gives you extraordinary gifts, surprises you every day with the sole purpose of making you smile. If he didn’t sleep all night and composed a long poem in your honor, only for you to believe in his sincerity, then you can call him a person passionately in love with you. If onsup for gifts and unoriginal, then you should doubt his sincerity to you.

Rule number 5

Girl's best friends are diamonds, or how much a man is willing to spend on you?

Do not forget that in the life of lovers there is one unwritten law on eternal values ​​- gold and diamonds. There is an opinion that these values ​​are the best proof of the sincerity of your loved one's feelings. Is it so?

Indeed, a man should give his beloved jewelry. Dear gift is already serious, it tells about the stability of your partner's feelings, that he is sure of his love and wants to show it to you. Of course, one should not wait for daily declarations of love in the form of a ringlet with diamond earrings or with rubies, unless your chosen one is an oligarch or a famous producer.

For an “ordinary” lover, presenting real jewels is a whole ritual. First, the decision is made to purchase such a gift - this is indeed a serious step for the men. Then - a long process of choosing the right gift. There is no secret that men are not so professional in the beauty of “eternal values” and they usually rely on women. Therefore, do not be surprised if your beloved accidentally leads you to a jewelery shop, supposedly to choose a gift for your birthday party. To the question: "What did you like?" - you just need to modestly poke your finger in the favorite trinket, not giving even the appearance that you really hope to get it.

Is there a direct dependence of the strength of feelings of your chosen one from the price of a gift? If you are wondering how ready your money is to splurge to make you happy, then you can certainly choose the most expensive piece of jewelry in the store. If he frowns and distorts that he cannot afford it, then you shouldn't blame him for his temper and unwillingness to prove his love. Remember that it is impossible to measure love in monetary terms. Most importantly, he wants to make you happy, and the price of the gift does not matter. Therefore, do not bend the stick, trying to get him to buy you the most expensive little ring, otherwise you risk ruining him or putting him in an extraordinary position if you still have to refuse him.

Pay attention to how a man presents you with an expensive gift, how original it is. A vivid proof of his strength is the extraordinary gift giving, for example, if he invites you to a restaurant where you find a ring that is on the right side of you, or presents you with a bouquet of roses, and a pearl in the center, which you have not even dreamed of.

If your lover has never presented you with any expensive trinkets, then it is possible that he has not yet been convinced of the strength of his feeling. Buying a jewel involves not only material costs, but also the presence of a man's confidence that he has found his destiny in your face.

Rule number 6

Lovely scolding - only amusing, or Who should be the first to apologize after a quarrel

You doubt the strength of the feelings of your chosen one, as you are constantly quarreling. It seems to you that your feelings are not tested for durability, because people in love should not swear so often. What hurts you is that you always ask your forgiveness first.

If you quarrel often, this does not mean that you do not love each other or do not want to be together. It is possible that you simply are not accustomed to each other - you are still in the stage of “lapping” and mutual checking, which is accompanied by constant quarrels and offenses. There is another way of explaining your behavior: from constant happiness in relationships, it becomes boring, too “luscious” life needs to be spared with something sharp — for example, a good quarrel. Indeed, after a good squabble, restoring peace and returning you a feeling of fullness of life. Therefore, do not worry if you too often swear, it does not mean that you and your lover do not harbor mutual feelings for each other.

One more fundamental question haunts you: who should be the first to reconcile? Are you sure that since he is so passionately in love, he must first come to you after a squabble and ask for forgiveness. If you always expect the first step from your chosen one, even in technical cases, when you are guilty, then you risk spoiling your relationship. After all, your beloved is also waiting for evidence of your sincerity from you and wants to hear from you the long-awaited “forgive”. Do not be so principled, try not to hear the voice of your vanity, because in this case it is not the best adviser.

To begin with, try to soberly assess your conflict, try to understand the opposite side — your chosen one — determine who is to blame. If, for example, he didn’t come on a date, don’t immediately blame him for being indifferent to you, try to figure out the situation: it is possible that this is a combination of circumstances. Nestoit roll hysterics and slam the door, not figuring out until the end why he did not come. Perhaps he was detained at work or he stood in a traffic jam. In such conflicts one should not be too fundamental and wait for an apology from his side. Understand that he is also the injured party.

But if your lover is really guilty and doesn’t completely remind himself of what he has done, if he has offended you greatly and is not in a hurry to ask for forgiveness, if he is waiting for you to boil over and call yourself, then this is an alarming sign. After all, a man who is in love with you should really be afraid that he might lose you, but if he wags his hand and does not even try to apologize, thinking that you will return to him already, then, most likely, he does not appreciate you and does not value your love .

Rule number 7

"If a woman asks ...", or what sacrifices is he ready for you?

Women assess the degree of a man’s love by the amount of sacrifices he is able to make for her. In order to check whether the beloved is sincere, the girls come up with all sorts of tests.

“Dear, could you give me a lift?” - and the expensive one rushes through the whole city in order to throw your own visual to the next metro station.

“Dear, we are moving, could you help?” - and the lover gives up everything so that his beloved is pleased. And in gratitude, he gets his long-awaited kiss. Women masterfully invent tasks for their Ivan Tsarevich: bring it, I don’t know what, and go to distant lands.

For a man in love, there are no insurmountable obstacles and irredeemable requests - he is ready for almost everything for you. The only thing to be remembered is a sense of proportion. It is known that a lover can move mountains, but do not force him to do it. Take care of the man, do not exploit a lot of active. Remember that in your hands - a fragile love heart, capable of anything that its owner will order.

But sooner or later, your beloved ceases to fulfill all desires. His eagerness to sacrifice for your time, friends, habits and interests begins to weaken. If you notice that your lover has begun to talk about your requests, referring to employment or illness, do not think that his love has weakened and he does not love you as passionately and unconsciously as before. You just moved to another stage of relationships. If earlier he ran after you, wherever you went, you threw everything away: business, friends - he was controlled only by the desire to be with you. Now, he stopped listening to your opinion when choosing, for example, a cafe or a movie session. A man begins to express his opinion, and you will be amazed to learn that it is different from yours.

Most women perceive these changes as a cooling of the feelings of men. This is not quite true. You just need to get used to the idea that no one can live in such a furious rhythm of love for a long time, your beloved has a period of calm. He is accustomed to your love, to the fact that you are reciprocating to him and that now he can calmly fall asleep, hugging you. He sure made enough to conquer you. But this is not at all a loss of love, a relentless feeling, but a transition to another stage of relations, more troubled, but no less happy.

Rule number 8

Hard boiled? Or maybe a soft boil? or about tastes do not argue

We decided to make a man pleasant and cooked for dinner your branded aspic fish or "Caesar" with shrimps? Relatives and friends are delighted with your culinary talents, but your favorite only pinched bread. And his praises sounded too unconvincing. And in the final, I didn’t drink the carrot juice you loved so much. He very upset you by refusing to eat food prepared with such love.

Some girls arrange their non-visual check on "food compatibility." They are sure that a man in love is able to eat even the spinach he hates, if that is cooked by the hands of his beloved. If he refuses to taste the fruits of their culinary creativity, this means that he is not in love with taxies, as he says.

In a familiar restaurant, you advise him to try the chef's specialty of lasagna with cheese. But for some reason he refuses from his advice and orders banal veal with fries. The thought that you are not a couple immediately comes to mind - after all, the tastes of beloved people usually coincide. The similarity of tastes is undoubtedly an important indicator of your compatibility, because with a successful scenario, you will have to create the menu of your chosen one every day. But think about whether to sever relations due to the fact that your future spouse prefers soft-boiled eggs, and you - hard boiled. And what if you have allergies to seafood and Caesar salad with shrimp, prepared by you, it is simply contraindicated.

This method of verification can not objectively testify about the strength of your lover. Such disagreements speak only to the coincidence of your tastes, which, as you know, do not argue. Remember that his taste was formed mainly due to his mother, still in childhood. She may have given him only a dietary meal since childhood, so he looks incredulously at the lasagna. It is also difficult to convince a person who has fed on fatty calories all his life, to switch to the healthier and healthier food you are used to.

Do not be so despotic and do not demand that, in order to prove your sincerity, your beloved will immediately change their food habits, developed over the years, and begin to eat like they used to vysami. First, try to find something in common in your tastes. For example, you both like to garnish potatoes in any form. Use it when cooking your first dinner together. And then do not be afraid to experiment. Try to combine dishes loved by both. Also, remember that your best mate is a man’s appetite. The most important thing is to diversify your table and make everything with love - and your beloved will be grateful to you.

Rule number 9

Football or talk show, or Who should give way in a TV fight?

Nothing brightens up our leisure like TV. In the winter long evenings so nice to sit over a cup of hot tea in front of a blue screen. But the trouble is: men and women very rarely come to a compromise when choosing a TV program.

You believe that your man should give you everything, including in such sensitive issues as a program for viewing. It seems to you that, in order to demonstrate to you the power of his love, he must give up his favorite TV show and with you delve into the successive “soap opera”.

Such tests are often even strongly in love with men under force and become the cause of serious quarrels. If you doubt the loyalty of your lover just because he never gives you a place in front of the television screen, do not rush to draw early conclusions. Just think: how do you feel about your being forced to miss your favorite show because of the live broadcast of the World Cup? Imagine: you just settled down comfortably in a chair in anticipation of a popular talk show, and your chosen one bursts in with a shout: “Turn on sooner First, show tamboxes”. Pinching your TV interests is more likely to come to you not to your taste.

Who really should give way to the place "under the sun"? In fact, such disagreements in television tastes should not be a reason for doubting the sincerity of your partner's feelings. You are not entitled to demand from him that he fall in love with your favorite talk shows, as he has no right, without your consent, to force you to watch his favorite hockey game. This will be called unchecking of feelings, but an attempt on personal interests and passions.

Most couples for whom the problem of television selection is particularly relevant, just buy a second TV. Someone sets a rigid schedule of viewing - one chooses a program on even days, the other - on odd days. Some couples are quite serious about the TV issue and schedule viewing for the whole week. In general, remember that even if your tastes are very different, you will come to a compromise if you want. One couple, for example, made it a rule to arrange something like a running competition: the point is to take first place “under the sun”. After dinner, throwing all the dishes on the table, they ran to the couch, taking the remote with them. The loser got the unenviable role - to wash the dishes and look at what the other one chose. The other pair is also very original in solving this problem - each time they draw lots, determining who determines the channel this time. In general, in order to find a way out of this situation, any method will do. The main thing is that this decision should be mutual.

Such checks will not help you find out how sincere your lover is with you, but they can seriously damage your relationship.

Rule number 10

Talk about the past, or often Does your loved one remember his ex-girlfriend?

Often the past intrudes into the relationship between a man and a woman - old passions, former friends, former love. Often this happens without the direct participation of living people, they return to our lives in the form of memories. Such memories can be dangerous for your relationship: if your man too often remembers his ex-girlfriend, it may indicate that she still lives in his heart.

If you notice a similar inclination behind your young man, then try to find out why he still remembers his ex-girlfriend, for what reason he tells you about her, it is possible that his feeling for her has not yet sunk into oblivion and he lives with memories of her. How to determine whether in such a situation, worry for the sincerity of your lover?

Pay attention to what moments of a relationship with a former girlfriend most often recalls. Be alert if your loved one uses the verb “loved” in his stories and talks about what he loved to do together, where they loved to walk, what was their favorite dish. If your darling remembers only the pleasant moments of their relationship, it means that they are dear to him and he does not want to forget them. Asking whether he remembers the merits of his ex-girlfriend, whether he often praises her or refrains from too loudly praising his ex. Is he able to get carried away with his story about their alternate trip to the sea or about their first date? If so, then his feeling for you needs serious testing. If he often mentions a name in a dream, or, having made a reservation, calls you by her name, it testifies to what he thinks about her more often than he should.

To determine if your lover, to this moment, has any feelings for his ex-girlfriend, ask about how they broke up. If their relationship ended not by mutual agreement, without his desire, then most likely his broken heart still survives the separation and, perhaps, he is still in love with her. Your role in his life at this stage of the relationship is not so enviable, you can not dissolve or trying to forget the past. Of course, you should not immediately jump on him with accusations that he used your trust. If you really care about this person, then in this case you need to do everything so that he can forget about her as soon as possible, not even remember her name. Create all the conditions for this: do not remind her and do not ask about their relationship for a while - wait a bit and he will forget about everything. As you know, time heals. You are able to revive your chosen one of love, if you are not indifferent to him. Be patient and your love will be mutual.

Rule number 11

“Beats - means loves”, or O inadequate ways of showing love

Is your chosen one able to raise your hand? Have you had to make up on several occasions so that others would not notice your bruises and abrasions? Is it possible to believe a man who is able to hit you, how does this characterize the strength of his feelings towards you?

In this case, one should not adhere to popular wisdom: “If it hits, it means that it loves.” Similar inadequate ways of manifesting love in men are in the past. From love, men in village families have proved their feelings in exactly this way, and women perceived this as a natural manifestation of love. Of course, such evidence was used by uneducated segments of the population; for example, noblemen were alien-like inadequate forms of showing love for a loved one.

A woman of the 21st century can safely reap the fruits of her predecessors' labor: the feminists of the whole world have already fought for her rights and freedoms. Physical abuse of a woman is unacceptable, therefore a man who swung at you was late for several centuries with similar manifestations of love.

In such cases, I advise you not to give up already won positions. Remember that if a man dares to raise his hand to you - he is not worthy of your love. His feeling can hardly be called love. A sincerely loving person is not capable of hurting a loved one's being. Just the opposite, it should protect you from extraneous influences. The behavior of a man who raised his hand to a woman speaks about his inadequacy. In fact, he is internally weak and notorious. It is possible that he is afraid to fight with a worthy opponent and therefore has found the easiest way for you to assert yourself.

A truly loving man may show strength in your adress with a noble purpose — to help you carry a heavy bag, move furniture, or defy the object of your dreams.

If he is capable of violence towards you, if he justifies himself and claims that he does it for the good and for the sake of love, if he swears that this will never happen again, remember that he is unlikely to change. If he hit you at least once, then he will continue to do so. Most likely you simply made a mistake in the choice, and you need to urgently leave and forget about the unfortunate novel.

Rule number 12

Othello in Love, or About Overly Jealous Men

You have noticed that your beloved is too jealous - he watches your every step, throws baseless accusations, prohibits talking to other men. How to regard this behavior: is his jealousy a natural manifestation of falling in love, or is such excessive suspicion unacceptable in the behavior of a lover?

There is an opinion that jealousy is the mera-love of one person to another. Lack of jealousy is often treated as a sign of indifference. If you define the concept of disease, then jealousy is rather the fear of losing a loved one, than a demonstration of love.

Jealousy is not an absolute indicator of sincerity, it cannot prove one hundred percent strength of feeling, although there is still a certain regularity between the power of love of your chosen one and his jealousy. It is natural for a man in love to feel a sense of fear and insecurity if he sees how you are courting this potential rivals. Valid jealousy can be considered a natural manifestation of his feelings towards you. Of course, a man in love should be jealous of the subject of his dreams. If your chosen one never expressed his suspicions, even in those cases when they actually gave him a reason: for example, they were too openly flirting with someone or were late at work until late in the day, then this would suggest that his feeling for you is not so much not afraid to lose you. Suspicion is peculiar to lovers and natural doubts.

Groundless and unreasonable jealousy has a different origin. The first option is unreasonable jealousy: you notice that your visionary is constantly attacking you with accusations, not leaving you alone. The reason for the reproaches is that you are closely watched by men completely unfamiliar to you, who are automatically added to your lovers. You have no rights to secrets or secrets, you are constantly under the control of your chosen one. Such jealousy is pathological in nature and is not evidence of loyalty and sincerity of feeling. The second variant of unjustified jealousy: your beloved is a typical loser: he was constantly unlucky with women, he very often ran into betrayal and deception. Well, naturally, in such conditions, he simply lost faith in the sincerity of all the opposite sex. Then the jealousy of your partner is simply a sign of insecurity in you and in yourself, the fear of being mistaken on one occasion. The third option is unreasonable jealousy: it is possible that your conceited one is too jealous because he himself would not mind going to the left. Jealous of you, he is just trying to cover his tracks, because, as you know, the best way  protection is an attack.

In any case, excessive unreasonable jealousy cannot be proof of the sincerity of your partner, most likely she speaks to some internal complexes of your chosen one or indicates that there is something wrong in your relationship.

Rule number 13

"This one will not miss a single skirt ...", or About the genuine interest in the opposite sex

Your chosen one looks at the passers-by girls, winks at the waitresses, flirts with the secretary of the boss. What do you think about all this? If you close your eyes on his pranks and try not to think about it - you are still the only one, he has no one else but you, - you make a mistake.

Excessive male attention to the opposite sex is the first sign that he is capable of treason. Mamavashi darling, with affectionate glance at his son, says that he is a little affectionate and loving, - watch out, because he didn’t see his father's birth: he cheated on her when she waited for the baby and ran off with a little curvaceous brunette. You may suffer the same fate, if you do not now determine what a person is in front of you. But be careful with the conclusions - do not blame your beloved, without reference to the excessive attention paid to the female sex.

Here is a brief psychological portrait of men lovelovers. Most often, they do not linger long on one object, they very quickly change partners. They are very gallant in dealing with women, nothing can slip away from their attention - neither a new hairstyle, nor a chic manicure, they will definitely mark your efforts. Don Juan almost every woman can find only her intrinsic dignity, which she herself prides herself in secret and which distinguishes her from others. The cunning seducers have the gift of eloquence and know how to speak love like real poets. It’s very easy to get into their networks, but it’s impossible to get out.

Do you suspect that your favorite of this category of men? Afraid that you are just another victim of lovelace? Watch the occupancy. If you have noticed by chance that your man, sitting with you in a restaurant, is looking at the table neighbor with interest, do not arrange for premature scenes. Try to find out delicately how this cute blonde blonde has attracted his glance. Perhaps your Romeo just noticed a gorgeous necklace around his neck and looks at him attentively, in order to present the same to you, or maybe he just became interested in her order - some kind of sea delicacy. This Don Juan, noticing a new "prey", can lose control of themselves and impersonate themselves. Influencing your question, your companion may enthusiastically list the advantages of the guest: “What are the magnificent eyes, what are the elegant figures.” After all, men-ladies' men at the sight beautiful women, exactly under the influence of truth serum, tell everything that they have naum. Now he is in your hands, and you decide how to deal with him.

But as they say, not caught - not a thief. Don Juanians often justify their excessive interest by saying that a normal man must react to a deep cleavage or short skirt. Do not be naively tested, remember that a man in love with you should only notice you, admire only you, show off with compliments only on you.

Rule number 14

An incorrigible liar, or is love compatible with deception?

You notice that your lover is prone to lies. He does not tell you much, you feel that he will always have a couple of secrets from you. Do you suspect that his ardent declarations of love - is this also a hoax? How to determine whether he is sincere in his feelings?

Passion for lies is undoubtedly a pathology. People lie because they want to simplify their lives, avoid difficulties, additional explanations - and, as a result, keep an unblemished reputation. A lie is a departure from a problem. Agree, it is much easier, instead of long altercations, with the authorities about the leave at their own expense to say that you are sick. Simply deceive the relatives, saying that you can not help them because of the zastastrophic employment, and not because they are just lazy. Easy and simple - and did not bother yourself, and did not spoil the relationship. That is why people like to lie.

If your darling deliberately distorts the truth in order to avoid additional difficulties, to avoid long explanations and altercations with you, this casts doubt on his feeling. Love is the limit of sincerity, the lover is not able to deceive the subject of his dreams. Even if he accidentally stumbled and deceived you, then he will be haunted by the feeling of guilt for his deed, and he will tell you the whole truth sooner or later.

If you caught him cheating, then this is a serious blow to his sincerity. But do not rush to immediately part with it without clarifying the circumstances. It all depends on how serious this lie is with the motives he guided.

Worry is when it comes to serious deception, for example, treason. If his deception is innocent, and he did it not to make life easier for himself, but rather to lose you, then do not be too hard on him. Recall, for example, the deception of the hero from the movie “Triplus Two”: fearing not to like it, he does not reveal the secret of his profession, but when he realizes that his feeling is already too serious, he still decides to tell the truth. This is the behavior for a lover is the norm. Therefore, if your chosen one stumbled over the service in order to appear better than he really is, then you shouldn’t blame him for insincerity.

There are other reasons why men cheat. It is possible that your beloved lies to you because you have put him in too tight a framework: for example, you demand from him that he devote himself to you all the time. To carve out at least an hour to communicate with his friends, he refuses to go to the cinema with you, referring to the headache. Of course, any lie is bad, but if you do not want to be deceived, then give your beloved a little more freedom, and he will be sincere with you.

Love and deception are compatible in those cases where your beloved does this only to save your relationship, not to make your life easier or to avoid unnecessary explanations. If you notice that he has too many secrets from you, if in relations with you he prefers to conceal the truth and distort reality, then this suggests that his feelings are most likely not real either.

Rule number 15

"I'll get you a star from heaven", or a little about romance

Is the conqueror of your heart day and night talking about your love? His proposals are as tempting as they are unreal. Together with him you dream of a house on the beach, dream of living in the silence of solitude. He accurately reads your thoughts, listening to him, you are transported into a world where everything you dream of is embodied in reality.

Is your partner's romance a proof of the sincerity of his feelings, or is it just a biased seducer whom only naive douche can bite?

Certainly, romanticism is characteristic of lovers, sometimes reaching the most extreme manifestations. As a rule, many men under the influence of the power of love are transformed: they acquire the ability to dream and soar in the clouds. But eloquence and excessive daydreaming cannot be an absolute proof of the strength of your chosen one's feelings.

Are you ready to believe your chosen one, having heard one kind word or a recognition? This is naturally a woman in love - easy prey, she trusts every word of her beloved and does not notice the obvious deception. In order not to become a victim of a seducer, do not trust him only. Pay attention to whether he is ready to demonstrate his feelings in practice. You should not, of course, demand that he really conquer the summit of Everest, which he constantly insists on, or he has got for you a star. Just look closely at how attentive he is to you, how he responds to your requests and whims, whether he is sensitive to you in fact or whether he just shows himself as an ardently passionate lover.

If you notice that your beloved is not capable of concrete actions to prove his love, if he says a lot about your happy future with a full cup, with a bunch of kids on the benches, with overseas dishes on the table, but nothing has yet been done to become a reality, if he is not ready to help you in difficult situations, then most likely you simply have a trivial seducer and his feeling is not serious to you.

It seems to you that your chosen one is not in love with you, since he is completely imperfect in romantic nonsense, peculiar to all lovers: he does not want to go for a walk in the moonlight, he doesn’t see any practical use in flowers, he doesn’t have a desire to sing a serenade to you under the window or write a creation in your honor . Such behavior for a person in love is not standard, but it does not mean at all that his feeling for you is sincere. It is possible that your chosen one is an exception to the general rule, it belongs to the category of men who, even being loved, are not influenced by romantic ideas and remain the same rational as they were before.

HOW IT IS POSSIBLE AND HOW IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO VERIFY THE FEELINGS OF YOUR SELECTOR

Rule number 16

Trust, but check, or Do you need to have feelings of a partner?

There are two extremes in the relationship of people in love. The first of these is extreme distrust of your partner. The second is an unconditional faith in the truth of the feelings of your chosen one. Both extremes in relationships should be avoided for quite objective reasons.

You strongly doubt the sincerity of the feelings of your chosen one, because you fundamentally do not trust men, because the representatives of the opposite sex have firmly established the glory of insidious seducers and destroyers of women's fate.

Of course, for lovers, the proof of the truth is that their partner’s feelings are necessary as air. Because of the fear of being mistaken in their chosen one, or because of the fear of being burned again, lovers require permanent confessions. To ask your lover to convince you of his sincerity is not a crime. This kind of attempt to protect themselves from deception. But it is important to decide what you want from your chosen one - to check his feeling or to be tortured with endless suspicions and baseless accusations, from which he will either develop paranoia, or he will simply run away from you. You should not be too distrustful and invent all more difficult tests to check his honesty, resort to podrugy friends or hire private detectives, thoroughly study his biography, check the pedigree, etc. Such total checks can only damage your relationship - your elect will be offended.

The second extreme to be avoided is the lack of confidence in your chosen one and confidence in the sincerity of his feelings. You may feel that you are a man of your dreams, you can be sure that he is sincere with you and is not capable of deception, it seems to you that you don’t need to doubt your loved one's feelings, because it can offend him. In your view, love is a feeling based on trust.

Do not be so confident in your talent to understand people. Such a position let down lovers girls more than once. In love, your intuition may not work. It is better to be safe and arrange a small inspection of your chosen one, even if you are one hundred percent sure that he is not a deceiver. Otherwise, blame yourself if this “wonderful” person, in whose sincerity you had no doubt, will leave you with a child in your arms. Do not neglect the advice of relatives and friends - they can point out those shortcomings of your chosen one that you cannot see.

The fact is that, under the influence of a love elixir, you cannot objectively judge the merits and demerits of your chosen one. It is very easy to deceive a man in love. If you are under the influence of a strong feeling, then it is difficult for you to recognize the deception of an underman of love and devotion. You may simply not notice the gain in the actions of your chosen one. A man, caring for you, may pursue his goal, maybe he attracted your position in society and financial viability, or your attractive non-impregnable girlfriend, whom he decided to take care of with your help. There are a lot of similar examples in life. Remember that your beloved heart can suffer very seriously if you are unsure and do not test your boyfriend for strength.

On how best to feel the feelings of your chosen one, some of the checks will not be too objective, and what better to refuse in general, so as not to harm your relationship, I will tell you in more detail in the following chapters.

Rule number 17

"Do you love me? Yeah ... ", or about eloquent declarations of love

Women in love want to be declared love every second. For many, there is no stronger evidence of a strong feeling than the 3 cherished words: "I love you." For them, it is simply incomprehensible that these magic words  can say an insincere person.

When you first hear a declaration of love from your chosen one, you are convinced of the reciprocity of your feelings. Gradually, these recognitions become an indispensable part of your relationship. It seems unthinkable to fall asleep, not having heard yet another bold words. It is impossible to imagine that your beloved will keep silent when he heard from you: “I love you”.

But, unfortunately, the verbal declaration of love is not always a guarantee of sincerity. In the speech we too often use the verb “to love” in a completely different meaning, with a completely different meaning: “I love to walk, I love tomato juice, I love good weather”. Therefore, the word gradually began to lose its main and main meaning - an expression of sincere feelings. To the words stopped to treat as sacred, which expresses some mystery, deeply intimate feeling. By trusting only the verbal confessions of your chosen one, you risk being deceived.

Men know from experience that women love with their ears, therefore, possessing an eloquent talent can easily convince you of their feelings. If a man wants to seduce you, then rest assured, he will be a moment to delight your ear with long confessions and crumble in the combinations.

How to distinguish the true "love" from the false? Do not rely on your intuition, because under the influence of the magic of the word you can lose the ability to distinguish truth from lies. One can only believe that he believes that he not only loves to talk about his feelings, but also shows his loyalty in other ways - if he values, protects from difficulties, seeks to help you in everything, tries to be close as long as possible and is ready to do everything to dropped out happy.

There is an opinion that sincerity of feelings directly depends on the beauty and originality of the confessions of your chosen one. Shakespeare's character King Lear suffered from such a delusion. He accepted the true love by the eloquent praises of two older, mercenary daughters, and could not recognize the real feeling of the younger daughter, because she could not find the appropriate words - “... With love yabogache than with words ...”. Be careful and do not repeat the mistake of King Lear: do not rely only on the eloquence of your chosen one, thinking that the more clearly your beloved, the more he loves you.

The real “love” cannot be calculated by the beauty of the descriptions at the depth of thought. Often, a truly in love person cannot clearly, clearly and beautifully talk about what he feels: most often he is confused by the upcoming confession, and no workout in front of the mirror can prepare him - he will still be nervous and nervous. What comes out of the heart cannot be expressed in words, it is beyond the human language. Therefore, do not be strict with your beloved if he is not too strong in rhetoric, this is not at all an indication that his feeling towards you is insincere.

Rule number 18

Life before and after love, or should your chosen one radically change their habits

It seems to you that he spends too much time on his hobbies and old friends. You are sure that if he loves you so much, you must try to change your life, you must leave your past habits and passions in the past. And in the present, he should strive to spend more time with you.

Lovers often go too far, demanding strong evidence of sincerity of feelings from their partners. Some want their elect to give up completely of their past, from the life that they had before they met. It seems to them that they should forever part with their old habits and learn old acquaintances from their lives if they interfere with the development of love relationships.

You decided to test your lover for strength, for example by asking him to quit favorite hobby - classes in theatrical circle, for which he takes too much time. Or you might feel that a man who is truly in love with you simply must refuse to meet with his friends if they did not have your taste. Are such checks objective?

For lovers, this behavior is quite natural at the first stages of relations. It is motivated by the fact that often one of the partners is simply jealous of his chosen one for his hobbies and friends.

If you want your beloved to completely belong to you, to be with you always, so that nothing gets in the way of your love, to warn you immediately - this is impossible. Therefore, to demand that he change his habits, thus proving his love is not worth it, it can only harm your relationship. Try to put yourself in the shoes of your lover. Can you, for example, give up your favorite hobby eastern dance  or run in the morning, will you stop communicating with your girlfriends yourself if your lover doesn’t like them very much? It seems to me that is unlikely. Believe me, it is very difficult for your beloved to make a choice between you and your past life. You put it in front of an insoluble task.

Your loved one has a life of its own, and you must reckon with it. You need to come to terms with it and accept it, even if you have something wrong with it. For example, it seems to you that your lover’s hobby is on the way of your relationship - and he even goes to a rock band at rehearsals or attends a theater group? The most correct position is to introduce him to his interests. Ask to take you with you to the rehearsal . He will definitely not refuse, he will be glad to reveal the secrets of his art to you - you will become his personal fan. Creative people  love when their talent is appreciated. Asam best way out of the situation will be if you try to divide his interests. For example, the group urgently needs a soloist, and you just have a remarkable vocal talent. Or in his circle they can’t find an actress for the role of Katerina from The Thunderstorm, and you learned the monologues by heart to the school. In this case, you will spend more time together and purchase interesting hobby.

Rule number 19

"Character resistant, nordic", or that attempts to remake a man are doomed to failure

Your lover in some way fails to reach the ideal, and you are sure that for your sake he will agree to correct his shortcomings. You believe that in time you will be able to remake your chosen one. Don't be so sure about that.

Many girls mistakenly believe that their chosen one should certainly change for the better, if your favorite woman asks for it. They believe that for a man in love, for example, it will not be difficult to quit smoking, to become more careful, more economical and more industrious. Once the lover gets into their network, the girls immediately take up the painstaking work of remaking the recklessly ideal man. And, to their surprise, they stumble upon a wall of misunderstanding: their lovers in love do not want to be altered.

Such a male reaction is quite logical. Men hate when they start to educate and redo. They want to find a woman who will love him and accept him for what he is, with all his disfunctions, and not the second mother, who grumbles and swears by chance. It seems to you that the masculine unwillingness to “change”, to become perfect, is evidence that his feeling for you is not so strong. This is not true.

Imagine the situation: your beloved is not as clean and careful as you would like. And in order to “develop” these qualities in him, you constantly lecture him about cleanliness and scold for every spot on the shirt. Can your admonitions develop a sense of accuracy in him? Hardly. Remember that your sweetheart is not a baby, but an already formed personality with its own advantages and disadvantages. And each of his shortcomings, which you would like to correct, is already rooted in his character.

Or, for example, you want your darling to prove his love for you to get rid of his bad habit - smoking. Do not try to convince your beloved to quit, referring to the harm of this activity. Understand: the same was hammered to him by his parents, teachers, and just passersby. And now he has reached the age when, it seemed, he had the right to manage his own health and respond to his actions, and you are trying to restore to him the feeling of fear for every smoked cigarette. The maximum that you can achieve is that your darling, like a schoolboy, will smoke in the stairwell and hide cigarettes from you.

If you decide to test his feelings for you in this way, then you can harm your relationship. Remember that to remake a man in an instant is impossible. If he really loves you and cherishes your vision, then most likely he will try to create the illusion that he has recovered. But he will experience constant discomfort in your presence, he will suffer and wait for the end of the meeting in order to smoke a cigarette or take off the hated tie that you force to wear. He will increasingly have a desire for whiteness, where he will be more comfortable and allowed to do what he has become used to, to behave as he pleases. This will certainly not be in your relationship.

Of course, the remaking of a man for smart women is not science fiction, but this is already a job not for a beloved, but for a wife. As a result, a woman spends years trying to get her beloved weeping, which she believes he lacks.

Rule number 20

Who loves whom more strongly, or About the most extreme proofs of love

It seems to you that you are capable of everything for the sake of your beloved - you are sure that for the sake of it you will be able to jump with a parachute, despite your fear of heights, or, for example, to rob a bank. But can he risk his life for you? Are you interested to know who loves whom more and if your lover will be able to respond to your love with a feeling of equal strength?

Lovers often arrange competitions with each other “Who loves whom more strongly?”. In a way, this is two loving hearts: “I called you first, which means I love you more, and I remembered you 332 times; I admired your photo for an hour yesterday, and I told my friend about you for two hours. ” But it so happens that the evidence becomes dangerous for the life of lovers.

There are many examples confirming the fact that a man in love is capable of anything to prove his love.

One loving couple decided to jump off the bridge into the river as proof of their love. It happened in the fall, the thermometer showed minus temperature. The couple stood on the edge of the bridge, by agreement, opened their eyes and counted to three. Romeo's lover jumped off. For his chosen woman, it was just a game, she could not even think that his lover was not joking. In search of help, she ran for almost a quarter of an hour - the area was completely deserted. The young man was in reanimation with a diagnosis of frostbite.

Another unfortunate case from the life of lovers: a girl will decide to show the power of her love. She promised her lover that she was not afraid and would go through a small forest clearing at night without taking even a lantern with herself. (According to rumors, most real werewolves were found in this place.) She was found only the next day - she got lost in the forest and lost her mind from fear.

The desire to compare the power of your feelings and the feelings of your partner is not a crime. Lovers want to see next to a man, whose love is just as strong as theirs. Require evidence of love from the chosen one in the form of trials with risk to life and prove your own feelings with such extreme methods is unacceptable.

If you have noticed in your chosen one a tendency towards such extreme manifestations of love, then be careful - do not provoke it. Even as a joke, it’s not worth saying that you will believe in sincerity only after he hijacks the plane and takes you to Spain. It was noted that some extraordinary abilities are definitely revealed in a lover, and from an ordinary student your chosen one can turn into a savior of the weak and oppressed, or, conversely, into a hooligan. Lovers often lose the criterion of good weather. They are able to do everything that their beloved will order, even if it disagrees with the generally accepted concept of morality.

If you really love your chosen one, then his life and health should be in the first place, and then all sorts of tests and intricate tests should stand. If you really yearn for your faithful to risk their lives for you, then most likely you are controlled by a selfish desire to see an inanimate person next to you, and an obedient zombie who will be capable of being around you.

Rule number 21

Features of female friendship, or Do not provoke a loved one!

You have decided to check how loyal your lover is to you and whether he can succumb to the charms of another woman. Your best friend volunteered to help you with this. Do not rush to resort to her help, you can not know what's on her mind.

The plan is simple: the best friend, under your vigilant observation, retires with your boyfriend and tries to pull him away. If he loves you, then he will not succumb to all her tricks. Even if everything is perfectly planned and your girlfriend is afraid of her own impartiality, you cannot be sure that the result will be objective.

Suppose he resisted and did not succumb to the spell. Does this mean that he can no longer be trusted unconditionally and is not capable of treason? Perhaps your girlfriend is simply not in his taste, or she did not have enough acting talent to seduce your chosen one. Maybe he just guessed that he was being tested - men smell like women's tricks, so he specifically portrayed the touches of his faithful lover, whose heart belongs to another.

And if he succumbed to the temptation, can this be an unconditional reason for the rupture of relations? Are you sure that your girlfriend acted exactly instructions? Maybe she overdid it, used forbidden methods of blame, against which few men can resist. Is it so honest and impartial when it says that your lover himself was the initiator of the kiss for which you found them? It is possible that a month after your break you will find out that your girlfriend and the former lover are dating. It may turn out that she has long been partial to him and just waited for the right moment. It turns out that they themselves gave her the "booty" in their hands.

Sometimes a friend tends to destroy your relationship out of envy — you are too perfect a pair, and she hasn't had anyone for a long time. Or your heartbreak girlfriend seduces your boyfriend from a purely sports interest, so to speak, to maintain prestige, and not to hurt you.

Therefore, to test your lover, try not to resort to the help of your girlfriends. Female friendship is a relative concept. Today, your girlfriend offers to test your beloved strength, and tomorrow she seduces him - and you are left alone.

Of course, you should not immediately get rid of all the friends, seeing in them dangerous opponents. Moreover, moving into the category of your enemies, they become even more dangerous. You just need to keep them at a distance from your beloved, just in case. And always be present at these meetings, do not leave alone and in any case do not be a friend of the peace judge of your relationship.

Rule number 22

Pranks, or On the invasion of the media in privacy

We quite often hear on radio and television about holding all sorts of practical jokes and contests on the theme “Strength test”. Passed the test - get a big and beautiful prize and approval of a multimillion audience, no - thanks for calling. Very often, for such entertainment are serious feelings of living people.

For the media, real feelings are a very good find. It is interesting for everyone to overhear or peep a bit of real life - hence the high ratings of such shows. The media seeks to open the veil of intimacy of your feelings. To test your partner, there are many ways to offer - for example, a callback with a request for a date, a raided meeting with a long-legged model who is trying in every way to seduce your chosen one. You play the role of a silent observer, who takes the verdict at the end of the show.

If you still took the risk and stated your desire to participate in the show (your lover loves you immensely, you are sure of it, yes, and you promised a solid…), then remember that no riches will save you from the emotional wound that you can inflict on your face man

The results of such checks are often biased and deceitful. The media workers are professionals, and be sure that in order to raise the rating they will do everything so that your lover will stumble and be tempted. They use a variety of methods to get the subject to agree to a date or kiss. Many men will not meet a stranger who confirms that she is his destiny and, as soon as she saw a beauty like him, she realized that it wasn’t can. Psychologically, saying “no” is very difficult, because you need to overcome your curiosity, step on your own song’s throat and throw away the heads: “What if it really is fate? I will meet with neyrazok, it does not oblige me to anything, and my girlfriend doesn’t even know about it. ” And she already knows, and the whole country knows! What is it like? A person who does not understand the subject shouts into the phone that he is on live broadcast and his girlfriend also gives him the floor, and he, apart from the dull “sorry”, cannot say anything, the participants will be thanked for the call and hang up. Five minutes to live broadcast  - and a broken heart. Then your lover for about an hour comes to his senses, tries to reach you to “thank” the surprise, but you refuse to talk to the traitor.

Such checks are fraught with sad consequences: you want a public proof of his love, and in return received public humiliation. It is possible that you will not be able to forgive his “television mission” precisely because they know everything from his friends and relatives and ending with his grandmother from the neighboring entrance.

Of course, your strong feeling may not be seriously hurt, but listen to the testimony of a lot of hurt feelings from your lover. Believe that such an intrusion into the personal life of your chosen one is worth it, and if you just decided to earn some money by winning in such a show, warn your lover about the upcoming draw in advance.

Rule No. 23

Changed, but I didn’t like it ... or About the “original” way to test your feelings

You accidentally learned about the change of your beloved, and he behaves as if nothing terrible had happened. He explains this by changing his good intentions, as he tested the strength of his feelings for you. Can you believe him?

He claims that he changed it to find out how much he loves you, and to prove to himself that he is good with you only and that he does not want to be with anyone else. Is it really?

Let's open all the cards at once: there is no betrayal for the good. People decide for infidelity for various reasons, the most important of which is the absence of strong feelings for a permanent partner. Often, a man is simply afraid to admit that his feeling has faded, this is dislike, and something else - friendship, affection, habit. This can be a secret for him, he has not had time to realize this yet, but the subconsciousness works faster and gives out a desire to change partner. Having changed, he subconsciously already looks for a new pair for himself, but he himself tries to find an excuse for his act. If your partner insists on the fact that his betrayal is nothing but a test of your own feelings for strength, then he most likely deeply hopes that you will not tolerate the hurt caused by you and break your relationship.

The desire to change, of course, can be generated by other reasons. For example, lack of sexual experience with another partner, desire to diversify your sex life (if you refuse to innovate and prefer traditional methods). Paradoxically, but the need for change may arise from your excessive jealousy. If you constantly accuse him of unfaithfulness, he may be tempted to change you so that the reproaches addressed to him are justified.

In any case, treason cannot be a good deed, a test of strength, as your chosen one claims. If he nevertheless insists on continuing your relationship and really does not want to part with you, then most likely your darling has a certain tendency to change and will continue to “test” his feelings for you in that way. The infidelity of your chosen one testifies only to one thing: his feeling for you has nothing to do with real love.

Rule number 24

"A girl named I want", or a little about women's moods and the male reaction to them

Some girls believe that the best test for a man in love is a test of women's whims. If a man is deeply in love, then he will fulfill the whims of even the most flighty person. Such a test is quite objective. Indeed, for your Romeo will not be difficult to perform your next whim.

Women's caprice is associated with the desire to be always in the center of attention of her lover. But at the same time, caprice is a manifestation of the weakness and dependence of a woman on a man. If you demand satisfaction of your desires, then you give a man in love with you a reason to show his care. Therefore, the execution of your whims should give your chosen one a real pleasure, because in this way he will make you a little happier.

But there is one thing that should always be remembered, resorting to this kind of checks: a whim a whim - strife. Examine the man’s reaction to your requests, and you will notice that if your desires do not infringe upon his interests and do not hit his wallet too much, then he fulfills them with pleasure, for example, he buys ice cream for you when you ask for him, or leads him to the cinema. With such requests, you can stick to your beloved infinitely many times, without the slightest fear of annoying him. He will be glad to make you happy.

Another option is when your moods are reflected in his interests, for example, you want to change his favorite style of clothing or stop talking to his childhood friends. Your beloved is unlikely to fulfill such vagaries, most likely he will conclude that you are too eager and do not give him any freedom. Do not overdo it, try to understand his feelings and do not overwhelm him with such requests. Trying to impose new interests and new friends on your chosen one, you risk at best to be ignored, and at worst, ask for rudeness.

There is another option when a man without much enthusiasm fulfills your request if this request causes serious damage to his financial condition. Too frequent requests to take you to an expensive restaurant or buy another jewel will cause your beloved doubts about the truth of your feelings. And you will be ranked as the most spoiled and naughty girls.

In such situations, an unwillingness to fulfill your request cannot be discounted as a demonstration of his insincerity towards you. Checking the urgency should not greatly infringe on the interests of your beloved, otherwise he may doubt your feelings.

Therefore, dear girls, be capricious - so you can verify the sincerity of your partner. In addition, constant requests will give your beloved self-confidence, he will feel stronger and more powerful in your society. But know the measure, and another man just run away from you to another, not so capricious person.

Rule number 25

"Help! Hooligans! ", Or Check for masculinity

At all times, the most faithful proof of the sincerity of the feelings of a man in love was the salvation of a beauty from villains, from imprisonment, from an evil wizard, etc. In the Middle Ages, knights fought for a lady's heart with dragons, griffins and other evil spirits. In the Enlightenment, women were fought for duels. Now the honor of the ladies defend in street fights with hooligans.

A street fight is not so romantic, aptitude is even more dangerous than a duel, but the certainty that you can rely on your chosen one, that you follow him as if behind a stone wall, will make him worthy of your unlimited love in your eyes.

But what if you still have not had a chance to check your beloved on masculinity? Fate does not want to arrange a meeting with a couple of hooligans from a dark alley. What to do? Is it worth it to stage a similar situation in order to finally see if your chosen one is worthy of love?

My advice: do not try to organize a theatrical attack in a side street by asking your friends to portray hooligans. You will not like any outcome of the provoked fight. He will either run away, covering you with an indelible shame in front of your friends, or he will stand up for your defense, and finding out what's the matter will be just in anger, because not only his courage, but love is the most important.

You have no right to dispose of your cavalier’s life and put it before a difficult choice: either to prove to the lady of the heart your loyalty and pasture to the battlefield, defending her honor, or to save your life and escape from imminent danger. Such tests can be arranged only by self-suicide.

If you still encounter in a dark alley with a noisy company local punks, then you can clearly see the strength of the feeling of the chosen one. For a man in love, it does not matter how much his opponent’s strengths surpass his own: if his beloved is at risk, he is ready to do anything to protect her. If he is not a bodybuilding champion or a black belt holder in karate, but an ordinary student of physics, who does not have supernatural physical abilities, be sure that he will not be afraid of danger, even if he has never fought in life. If your cavalier has defended you against the impudence of these impudent ones, then congratulations — he passed the test of strength. But if he turned around and started running, flashing his heels, then his feeling is not sincere and you better forget it as soon as possible. Although after such a case it is unlikely to ever remind you of its existence.

Real courage does not need to be demonstrated and tested. It will necessarily manifest when it is necessary - if you really get into trouble. Therefore, it is better not to provoke dangerous situations and beware of walking along with your loved ones along the dark alleys.

Rule number 26

“I am leaving for the south - for the time being”, or about the test of strength by distance

To test the strength of your feelings, you need to be a little apart from each other, so to speak, to experience your love by distance. Will he survive two weeks without you, or will he forget about your existence on the first day? Will he wait for you, call or will his phone be constantly out of range?

The verification method is quite reliable. You will be able to verify yourself whether he will pull you “to the left” and, at some point, to see if he keeps himself from the temptations in your absence. In any case, noni do not trust only his words, do not leave a lover unattended. Being far away from you, he can call and send text messages every five minutes, while he himself hangs out at a trendy club with a bunch of pretty girls at this time. Be sure to ask someone to watch him in order to know exactly what your chosen one is actually doing. Do not trust the best friends who will cover your beloved, while they together are indulging in your absence. On your girlfriends, too, especially not worth relying. It is better to ask a good friend who, in principle, is indifferent to your relationship, and he will be a completely impartial judge.

I advise you to use a similar method of checking in the event that you really want to relax from each other, and do not torment yourself with similar evidence if you are unable to survive without a single day, but for the purity of the experiment, on the advice of friends or parents, you decided to part for a month or two. Believe me, for you and your chosen one this parting will be a real test, forcing lovers' hearts to part - this is violence.

But if you really doubted the sincerity of your beloved, and you yourself are not averse to lying in the sun, then take a girlfriend with you - and go. In the case of such a check, it is not necessary to conduct a ascetic life - it seems like “I am given to another, therefore I will not go to a disco, nor to a bar, nor to a restaurant.” Relax and get permissible pleasures. Give yourself a festive holiday, but keep boundaries - do not rush into all serious things. Otherwise, this will no longer be a test of your feelings, but a proof that you are tired of your lover and want changes.

Do not expect from your lover that he will be sitting at home with a TV set, with thoughts of you and a miserly man’s tears. Do not hope that he will lose his appetite and he will lose weight and become pale in anticipation. Take it easy that your personal eye will be noticed several times in a bar with friends, where it will “wave” too much. If you relax - he, too, can afford it. The main thing is to remain faithful to you and remember more often. Then your meeting will be a real holiday after separation: the station, 6 o'clock in the morning, and your beloved one with an armchair and a little tipsy: “Finally you have arrived, dear.”

Rule number 27

Let's talk heart to heart, or do your views on the future coincide?

Do you often discuss future plans with your lover? I do not mean a picnic next Sunday, but what awaits you in a year, in two or ten? Do you often dream together? Do your thoughts coincide with the thoughts of your chosen one?

If you are afraid to inquire about the intentions and plans of the future of your beloved, then you make a mistake. After all, this is also a kind of test of his feelings for you. If your beloved is not sharing his innermost thoughts, this means that he is not yet ready to reveal his soul and devote you to his secrets, which means he is not sure of his choice.

If he likes to chat with you about what he expects from life, then pay attention to what place in his stories is given to you, his idea of ​​cloudless happiness coincides with yours, is he your opinion or does he have his own plan, in which you do not write by definition.

For example, you dream of a quiet, cozy cottage somewhere in the distance from a big city and noisy roads, where there is a lot of fresh air, and a pine forest. And that someday you must make a real horse. She will be pitch-black, leggy, and her mane will flutter in the wind. And your lover with passion describes his future as a bachelor-banker who lives in the center of a big metropolis, in his most smoky part. He wants to see some exotic predator, for example, crocodile or tiger cub. Are you a couple? If he doesn’t give you a place in his happy future, then watch out - he’s just still not ready to let you in there, most likely his feeling is not yet strong enough, and he hasn’t yet thought about connecting your destinies.

There is one more good way  test your darling's feelings. Try to transfer yourself with your chosen one to the X year ahead and imagine your ideal old age. For example, you see yourself as a rather young and modern grandmother who uses the newest anti-aging agents, you are active and progressive, play sports, arrange parties, listen to pop music and ask your granddaughter to denounce clothes. And your chosen one imagines a completely different old age — quiet and secluded, somewhere in the mountains, in a fairly large but quiet house, similar to a real English castle. Guests in his dreams are rarely visited, and a favorite way to spend leisure time is to sit together by the fireplace and read a book.

If your plans for the future drastically diverge, then you should not part immediately, deciding that you are not a couple. Do not immediately try to force your chosen one to change his ideas about the future, do not demand the impossible from him: that he should give up his dream radivas. In such a situation, it is best to wait: after all, if you have a good place in the present, if you have a lot in common, then it is quite possible that the near future views on the future will also coincide. But if Vasya has little in common in the present, then most likely you will hardly ever be a harmonious couple.

Rule number 28

If he is too shy ... Or is it necessary to show his feelings in public?

It seems to you that he does not love you enough, since he does not show his feelings openly, does not want to show his love for show. Your chosen one is not very impulsive: he does not try to kiss you in public, pinch your cheek, call him your pretty girl with your friends. Is it possible to test his feelings, demanding from him a public display of his love?

For lovers peculiar demonstration of their sensitive public. Very often, we observe that two lovers just do not notice that they are not alone, and quite vividly show their feelings in public places. They prefer to openly demonstrate that they are in love, and they are not at all embarrassed by the reproaches of old women demanding "to stop this disgrace." If you belong to this category of lovers, then your openness is a serious argument in favor of your feelings for each other. But if you notice that your beloved shy away from publicly showing their feelings, then do not rush to immediately draw disappointing conclusions.

The point here is not only the strength of his feelings. As you know, people are divided by type according to extroverts (open) and introverts (closed). Your lover’s belonging to one of these types may explain his unwillingness to express his feelings in public.

If your lover is always stingy in expressing his emotions in social-sided people, his closeness is not at all a sign of his coldness and insincerity. Most likely he feels insecure and constrained in society. He usually has the same mood - he is not cheerful and not sad; He dresses discreetly, so as not to become an object of envy, nor a subject of ridicule, apparently he is not emotionally, he has real passions boiling inside him. These are signs that your sweetheart is an introvert.

Such people are closed by nature. Requiring a shy person to prove his feelings as an open manifestation of his love in public should not be. If your lover is too shy, then you will have to be content with his caresses and tenderness, only when you take off alone.

If he is accustomed to publicity, sociable and always very willing to show his feelings in public, then he belongs to the category of extroverts. But you notice that for some reason your beloved is not very active in manifesting her love, does not want to show it, or in general hides her attachment to you from others.

This behavior should arouse your suspicion. You have the right to demand evidence of his feelings in the form of public kisses and caresses. Try as an initiator at first: kiss him more than usual, hug him tightly in public transport - and look at his reaction. If he resists, if he doesn’t want such openness on your part, then he is likely to be shy or afraid of something — it’s possible that he hasn’t yet been sure of his feelings, so he doesn’t want to tell others about them earlier, or maybe he’s just embarrassed your relationships - for example, you do not fit the generally accepted standards of beauty, for example, you are a bit full or a little older than him.

In any case, if you are faced with the problem that your naughty is embarrassed to express your feelings in public, then it is best of all to talk with him about it and find out the true reason for his behavior. If he can satisfy your curiosity and reasonably justifies his "shyness," then you should not put him a little weakness in reproach. And if he cannot explain to you comprehensibly why he is embarrassed to show his love, it means that he deliberately hides her from others, hides his feelings. This fact puts into question his sincerity.

Rule number 29

“Mom, Dad, is Masha”, or is it necessary to get acquainted with his parents?

You are almost convinced of his sincerity. He is a completely positive character and fits the role of the hero of your novel: caring, intelligent, tolerant of whims, light in his eyes, sugar on his lips. But bad luck - your beloved carefully hides you from their parents. What would it mean?

Most girls do not attach particular importance to this fact, even if the relationship has already passed into the permanent phase and there is neither “I” nor “he” - there is only “we”. How does your partner’s failure to introduce you to his parents characterize his feelings for you? Can you believe him? Is it necessary to demand that he introduce you to his relatives?

Familiarity with parents is an important factor in the further development of your relationship. If this happens, then it means that your lover intends to continue the relationship with you - in marriage or civil, as you like.

Of course, it is not necessary to demand and insist that he prove to you his feelings and introduce you to his relatives. You just need to hint to him that you are ready to get acquainted with his friends. If he fulfills your request, then you are on the right path: your lover really takes you very seriously.

But if he dodges an undesirable acquaintance for him, this is not the point in his favor. He tries his best to ensure that his swami parents did not meet, and if you accidentally stayed longer than the usual iwoth “ancestors” should descend, he will slowly lead you through the black staircase. The matter, of course, is yours, how to react to such tactlessness - you can tolerate offense and continue to play the partisan role assigned to you, but remember that in such a situation your relationship faces a fiasco. If he refuses, despite all your persuasion, to acquaint you with his relatives, it means that he is simply not ready for a serious relationship and has not yet become convinced of the strength of his feeling towards you.

There are, of course, other reasons for the refusal of your chosen to acquaint you with your father and mother. For example, his parents are too authoritarian, and he still remembers how his mother drove away the former girl, who, according to the parent, had seduced her son. Afraid of losing you, he protects you from such stress. Or another reason: parents lead not quite the right way of life - they often make booze and sabantui. He is just ashamed of them, so he in every way delays the moment of your meeting.

In any case, you need to talk to your chosen one on this topic and find out what's on his mind. You should not ignore and mention this problem. If your lover can give at least an approximate explanation of this fact, then you should not blame him. But if he cannot answer, then think about it - maybe he is ashamed to show you to his parents (for example, he is from an intelligent family peasant class) and in the near future intends to look for another, more suitable party that his relatives will like.

Rule number 30

A stamp in the passport, or the main proof of his love

The stamp in the passport is not for nothing called the main proof of the strength of the feelings of two loving people. After all, no matter how further their fate is, having exchanged rings, they promise each other long and happy life together. Although in practice it often happens differently.

Modern morals have turned everything upside down - marriages of convenience and wake have entered into the norm, which consist not of mutual consent and love, but of mercenary motives or need. Well, all this calls into question the fact that the registration of relations is a true proof of the power of feelings for two lovers. Sometimes it seems that you are simply complicating your life with all sorts of bureaucratic procedures, you spend an insane amount of money to arrange this celebration. But nevertheless, lovers continue to register their relationship. And many are convinced that this is the most important proof of sincerity of feelings.

The desire of your chosen one to marry only then can be an objective proof of his sincerity, if it is accepted voluntarily and if your beloved is aware of the entire responsibility that lies on his shoulders.

Of course, it’s not worthwhile to demand proof of your feelings in the form of the realization of your long-awaited dream of a magnificent and beautiful wedding from your chosen one, even if you are unwilling to marry. First of all, your beloved should start talking about marriage, he should make an independent decision that he wants to marry you, and then ask your consent. If he often began to talk about the wedding and was no longer a joke, but was seriously preparing to join your destinies, then this suggests that he was convinced of the correctness of his choice and is ready for a serious step to create a family.

You must be sure that he wants to connect his life with you by free will, consciously, and not just under your pressure. Only in this case, his desire to marry will be proof of the sincerity of his feelings, otherwise you should not marry at all. Try to find out his motives - why he needs a wedding, really Lyon wants you to become his wife, as he imagines your local life.

If your elect is too frivolous about marriage, if he cannot explain to you the motives of his behavior, then he simply does not understand all the responsibility of the decision made and, therefore, is not yet ready for this step. It is possible that you yourself are dragging him on a string at the WIZAGS, not allowing you to come to your senses, worrying that he does not change his mind, asks you to do this for you and calm him down with the thought: “If you don’t receive, we will divorce.” Marriage based only on your desire will not be long. Your lover must understand that this is not just a trial step, that this is not a joke, but very serious and always.

Do not be too strict with your man, if he delays the offering of hands and hearts, this does not mean at all that he is insincere with swami, just men are so arranged that it is much harder for them to make similar fateful decisions. They first need to think about everything, analyze and weigh carefully. If you feel that your chosen one truly loves you, but has not yet made you an offer, give him time to think, and he will surely meet your expectations.

IS I IN LOVE? VERIFYING YOUR SENSES

Rule number 31

One loves, the other allows himself to love, or the Denial of the law on lovers

If you have doubts about your own feelings, this is normal. You need to check yourself no less carefully than your partner. For example, at some point in your relationship you suspected that your feeling towards your partner could not be called love. Although you may think that your chosen one is just a godsend. The young man loves and worships you, but you rather calmly accept his courtship, you are reasonable and balanced in your feelings for him.

Sometimes in a pair of roles are distributed as follows: one loves, and the other allows himself to love. And both are satisfied with such a relationship. Such a "symbiosis", of course, has nothing to do with real mutual love.

In such a situation, you may not even notice that you are replacing the present feeling with the selfish desire to be loved, without giving anything in return. Such a desire may appear if you have had unsuccessful or unrequited love in the past, if you have suffered greatly from a person who was loved without limit. As a result, they generally lost faith that they would ever fall in love again. You spent a lot of energy on feeling, which ultimately caused you only suffering, so now it’s quite natural for you to strive for comfort and reliability in relationships. It is possible that you met a man who turned out to be able to restore your strength. He can give you only himself without a trace, since he truly loves you. In some kind of period, you can even feel that you are happy with it, because it takes care of you, gives you its warmth, but this is only an appearance of happiness, because you don’t really love yourself.

How to determine whether your desire to be with your partner is a real feeling or is it one-sided love? Analyze your feelings for your chosen one: do you see your lover as you do, do you miss him so much , with the same pleasure you fulfill his caprices, as he is yours. You have noticed that you always accept the victims of your chosen one with joy, but you do not want to sacrifice yourself to him, he worships you and does not pay attention to shortcomings, while you keep your sanity, do not go to extremes, like all lovers, it is important for you to receive his energy , but not to give my own. If this is about you, then most likely you are simply manipulating your chosen one, remaining indifferent to him.

I hasten to reassure you that your relationship will remain the same as now, forever. If your lover gives all his energies and does not receive anything in return, his feeling will weaken over time and may completely disappear. One-sided love has no place in life, it is viable. Therefore, the widespread belief that couples, in which only one loves, and the other allows himself to love, is very durable - this is just a misconception. Such couples cannot be together for long.

Your relationship is not based on mutual feelings, but only on your selfish desire to be loved, but not to give anything in return. Remember that lovers must give as much as they receive. To preserve your feelings, you must share your psychological energy in the form of caring, gentle and caring friend to a friend.

Rule number 32

Cold mind and warm heart, or the harmony of feeling and reason

How to determine whether your feeling is true or it will fade with time, and your lover will become former acquaintances? Is there an absolute indicator of the truth of your love? If you have doubts about the truth of your feelings, then the first thing you should check is whether you accept other feelings, such as passion or strong friendship, for love.

There is one important factor to which attention should be paid when analyzing your own attitude to the subject of your vision. Determine that in your attitude to it is dominant - feeling or reason? To do this, spend a little self-observation.

As a result of your observations, you came to the conclusion that the feeling that you are experiencing now has overwhelmed you completely: you cannot live without your beloved, you can’t forget it for a second, everything falls out of your hands, if you don’t have it, you feel if someone or something gets in your way, then you will be ready to do anything to defend your feeling. Emotionally, you are at the limit — as if in delirium or agony. For your relationship is characterized by suspicion and excessive jealousy, which come from the fear of losing your desired. This is a description of passion. In your relationship, the sensual beginning dominates and there is practically no place for the rational.

Passion is not love, but its opportunity. You are on the way to a great feeling, you just have to wait some time, the desire to be close to your chosen one, turning into a discharge of mania, will be slightly dulled and you will be able to reason intelligently again. While you are in a rather dangerous phase of relationships, it is the passion that causes many madnesses committed by people in love. Try to control your actions, do not divide your life into two halves - your pure and bright feeling and the rest of the world, hostile to your relationship. Begin to reason sensibly and do not commit foolish acts, then, perhaps, by our modern passion will grow into a more durable and stable feeling - into love.

Another variant of your relationship with a partner: you are interested in talking with him, he is for you - a storehouse of wisdom, when you are with him, you are comfortable, when he is not - you are doing your usual things. His appearance in your life did not change your habits, activities and attitude to life in general. If this is about you, then your attitude to the partner is most likely strong friendship. Friendship can grow into a stronger and stronger feeling of affection, and perhaps even into love. As long as your relationship is based only on intelligent communication, your feelings are still asleep. Try to open your heart for a strong feeling, do not be afraid of anything, fill your relationship with warmth and humanity, and you will be able to get closer to the moment of the birth of true love.

From the point of view of the relationship between feeling and reason, love is the utmost harmony of these two opposing entities. If you notice that you have a strong feeling, but at the same time, your mind constantly finds food for analysis - you are interested in it, in tune you miss you a lot and you can’t help thinking about it, it fills up your leisure time, but you can control yourself and do other things its absence means that the two beginnings are equally combined in you - a cold mind and a warm heart. This is a sign that you are on the right track - you really love your chosen one.

Rule number 33

Rich Buratino, or Money decides everything

He is a successful businessman or the owner of a large enterprise with a good income. Constantly gives you jewelry and chic bouquets of flowers to prove your love. You are not sure of the strength of your feelings ... You are very pleased to receive expensive gifts, but you doubt that it is your destiny.

If your chosen one is rich and successful, then you can secretly replace the true feeling of love with the desire to live in comfort and warmth. In order to test yourself, try to analyze your attitude towards your prince on a posh Mercedes - you need to filter out all unnecessary things, try to imagine him without the material benefits that he possesses. Answer yourself the question, how would you treat it, if only your rich Buratino was not as fabulously rich as we are now.

Indeed, financial soundness is an important factor when choosing a groom. AT modern world  we choose a partner not only his intelligence, honesty, intelligence, courage, but not in the last place put his material well-being. Most importantly, this quality does not dominate when choosing a partner, but was only an additional bonus.

It is possible that you value only wealth and generosity in your elector, but you simply do not pay attention to other qualities. Luxury has firmly entered your life: you simply cannot imagine your existence without a wide-screen LCD TV, constant visits to restaurants and without jewels that donate your beloved.

If you want to determine whether your feeling is sincere, and not simply a banal desire to live without material problems, then you have to get rid of the “material” dependence or at least during the test not to overuse the consistency of your loved one. Try to imagine how you would live with him, if only he were not so financially safe. To start, do everything that you used to do - every day, reduce the dose. For example, make shopping more often once a week, do not ask your beloved to buy you a regular bauble, try to unlearn from expensive restaurants and cook at cooking. If you can do without these familiar clues, then you are ready to appreciate the strength of your feelings for your chosen one. If it is interesting to you in itself, even without all these pleasures, then I congratulate: your relationship is something more than just a passion for comfort and earthly benefits. If you can't manage to get rid of such habits and your beloved Sampo does not represent value for you without his wallet, then your feelings for him cannot be called love. In this case, you decide what you want more - big and pure love  2 bedroom apartment in the center of Moscow.

But be prepared for any life turns - suddenly your chosen one will become bankrupt. How will you respond to this event? If, besides his financial solvency, he did not attract you in any way, then your feelings for him would fade immediately.

Rule number 34

We have been together for many years ... or Habit is a terrible force

You have been together for a long time - for several years. He was your school love, very nicely courting, always escorted home, wore your backpack. Then your attention was flattering. You were practically the first girl in the class who had her boyfriend, but now it seems to you that your feelings are no longer as strong as they used to be.

Your doubts are completely objective: indeed, if you have been together for too long, your feelings might have been dulled. Let's see together how you feel about your partner. This is quite difficult to do. The fact is that you are already a part of the whole, it’s hard for you to imagine life without each other. You have everything in common - tastes, hobbies, friends. But is it love?

Analyze your life together - is it so similar to the romantic union of two lovers. Perhaps, it no longer has room for romance and life reigns with might and main. Is it in your living place for love confessions, for mutual caress and tenderness? If you are still affectionate towards each other, then most likely you have maintained a warm love relationship to each other. It is possible that they need a little shake. You have the power to make a difference –add a highlight, try to revive the old power of your feeling. Use traditional methods for this - a candlelit dinner, a new hairstyle, a chic dress. This should positively affect your chosen one.

Talk to your beloved one and understand your feelings together. Do your relationships develop or have you settled on one point? It is possible that your relationship is based only on your memories school years, on carefree years, when they flee from lessons and secretly met in the city park. Very often people live with memories, but reality is not of any interest to them.

If you feel that the real and strong love  already in the past, and for real - only hopeless and monotonous everyday life together, then it is in your power to change your life. Do not be afraid to offend your life partner, even if in the past he has done a lot for you, if it seems to you that he still loves and idolizes Try to find out how he treats you, whether he wants change. As a result of heart-to-heart talk, you can find out that he himself was tired of your relationship a long time ago, but he was afraid to break them, because he didn’t want to hurt you.

How to get rid of the habit, if you realized that your feelings were in the past? It will not be easy. Don't do this all at once. First prepare the soil.

If you live together, then try to live separately - go to distant relatives, allegedly on the anniversary of your favorite network, and stay there for a week. If you just meet for a long time, then give up too many meetings, even if it is not so easy. In order for parting with former lovers to be less painful - change the image, dye your hair, update your wardrobe, try to find yourself an interesting hobby that will help you spend less time at home, flirt with other men - so you will prepare the ground for parting.

But in any case, do not chop off the shoulder, do not part with your beloved man, if you thought that your feelings just didn’t accept. You will be able to reanimate them, the main thing is to make this effort.

Rule number 35

Maternal love, or the variations of the Oedipus complex

You take too much care of your lover and, like his mom, watch his every step, worry that he does not catch a cold - you tie a scarf to him if it is windy outside. You see in him a rather big but dependent child who needs your care than strong manable to protect you.

Your love is comparable to motherly feeling, because you see in your partner not a man-lover, but a child who needs affection and warmth. Such over-care and concern for your lover may indicate that you are faced with a variation of the Oedipal complex. Of course, we are accustomed to see similar deviations in uneven-aged couples, when one partner is much younger. The younger member of the couple seeks to find in his chosen parent, whom he was deprived of in childhood. But different age  Is not the main indicator of such a relationship. Even in pairs in which there is no great difference in age, such anomalies also occur. The partner’s independence, his inability to act without your indication can be a symptom of such a psychological disorder. Such a relationship is inherent overly gentle and loving. On your part, there may be constant concern for your elect, similar to maternal care.

Analyze your relationship if you want to find out if your feelings are true love. If you have noticed the signs of maternal love in your relationship, then you must give up standing over your lover. Try to change your attitude to him, trust him more, hold him responsible, demand important decisions. So you can look at him as a real man worthy of your love. If you continue to feel tender and quivering feelings for him, if you see in him not only an object for the exit of your care and affection, then your relationship is based not only on the maternal instinct. It is possible that true love.

Often a woman wants to see next to her a non-independent and intimate man, as she is eager to give birth to a child. You should remember that choosing a life partner is not necessary for the realization of the maternal instinct. Otherwise, your feelings may be under threat when you really have the firstborn, about which vytak dream. Your love, which you are now spending on your chosen one, will go to the baby, the man will have only a small part, there is a danger that you will forget about the existence of your beloved.

Rule number 36

Who, if not him? or about your subconscious fears and hidden virtues

Your chosen one is the first and only man in your life. He is far from perfect, not at all the way you imagined him in girlish dreams, he does not pay enough attention, does not care about you, ignores your whims. But you are afraid that if you leave him, then no one else will ever want to love you.

Your relationship is not based on true feeling, but on your subconscious complexes. Most likely, you are retaining the faithfulness of your lover only out of fear that he will fall in love more than you. Most likely you are no longer in love with him, and you are guided by the fear of being alone.

The history of your relationship can be different. Here is one of the options for the development of events. As a child, you may have been waiting for your first kiss for a very long time. You told your friends about the mythical bridegroom of another city, which comes very rarely, but floods you with letters you wrote yourself. And in the evenings you poured into a pillow, thinking that no one will ever love you. And here he appeared - the first man who drew attention to you. He didn’t care for long - you immediately surrendered, on the first date - your first long-awaited kiss. His attitude to you turned your world around, now you could not invent a groom, but present a living specimen. Your friends, of course, were not delighted with him - rude, ill-bred, not gallant. But you just did not care about their opinion.

Look at the complexes of your loved one, its shortcomings, look at it objectively: is it good enough for you? Do you really want to tie your destiny with it, or do you simply do it because your complexes do not allow you to radically change your destiny? . If you begin to notice that your passion has gradually faded away, he no longer seems to you to be a prince who has freed you from your suffering, but you are simply afraid that by breaking off your relationship, you will return to the same state without accountability, drive away your fear. After all, the first step has already been taken - you know that you can please someone, now the main thing is to develop self-confidence. If you really do not see the point in the continuation of your relationship, then you can safely stop them. If you are convinced that he is not a couple to you, do not be afraid to change your life, try to find your true happiness.

Take a closer look at yourself - try to change not only externally, but also internally - throw off the mask of a loser, whorejected in search of her lover. In your eyes, men should see not longing and suffering, but hope and light, and the most important thing is the desire to find true love.

Rule No. 37

I am afraid of losing my love ... or About heightened anxiety of a man in love.

You are always afraid for your feelings, it seems to you that something can interfere with your happiness: your lover may stop loving you or someone will try to separate you. Is this condition of increased anxiety normal for lovers or is it a sign that your feeling is unstable and sooner or later it will die anyway?

Fears and concerns for your love are a natural symptom of falling in love, it says that your feeling develops according to all rules and regulations. Lovers tend to panic and exaggerate the danger that may threaten their love, they are worried that outside influences can destroy their feelings. The most important fear that can haunt them is fear of losing their beloved, fear of inconceivable separation for both. In this period, the world appears to you as a hostile principle against your strong feeling.

Usually such increased anxiety is characteristic of the initial stage of the relationship, when you still can not cope with the overwhelmed vasemotions. If you fall in love and realize that your love is mutual, you gain harmony and happiness. But man is so constituted that he cannot remain in a state of serene happiness for a long time. Even if nothing threatens to alter the conditions in which you are located, if there are no visible obstacles to the development of your relationship, you still get nervous and you can survive, you can come up with and create problems where they are not.

Do not think that you will live in constant anxiety for your beloved and your love. Gradually, you will get used to the fact that your feeling is sincere and mutual, that he is threatened with nothing by others. To fight with such manifestations of love is useless. Only this time can help you in this situation. Over time, your emotional stress begins to subside. Someone mistakenly accepts similar changes in relationships for cooling feelings. In fact, your body and your heart in love just get tired of being in constant tension, so you move on to a new stage of development of your relationship.

How long can the state of anxiety last for your feeling? The three-year milestone is critical for the feeling. This is witnessed by the observations of “experienced” lovers, who say that after a few years, the period of habituation begins. It is then that the feeling of “infinite” happiness and the feeling of anxiety passes. Someone calls it cooling, someone stabilizing feelings.

Rule number 38

I do not want to wash his socks! or about the test of life

You are sure that life kills love, therefore, in every possible way we delay the moment when from the romantic phase of dating your relationship should go into cohabitation and you will have to wash and cook, from which you will simply shiver.

The opinion is widespread that the intrusion of everyday problems into the lives of lovers destroys feelings. This opinion is based on the fact that life is associated with the majority of people with snispikoplotnost, which opposes romance as a pure beginning. Love is a bright feeling and should be fed from similar sources. Feelings become stronger from the night of romantic walks under the moon, and not from cleaning and washing floors. Your passion flares up from talking about high, from dreaming about the future happiness, and certainly not from the hassle of home and washing dirty socks.

In fact, if your feeling is based only on narromantic conversations and mutual confessions, then it is devoid of practical vitality. For the development of relationships, you simply have to move on to the next stage - living together.

If you can’t imagine that you will have to do laundry, this means that you are simply afraid of the responsibility and are not yet ready for a serious and full-fledged relationship of two lovers.

If you want to continue your relationship, then be prepared for the fact that the demand from you and your beloved will be much more. Your concern and attention to your beloved will be completely normal proof of feelings. You will have to keep track of his appearance, because how he looks will be evaluated by you as well. Believe me, this is not easy. You will be condemned for the fact that your chosen one is hungry that he has a stale shirt, that he is unshaven. You will have to get used to the idea that you are responsible for your illness, your lover will also begin to measure the power of your love with the inaccuracy of your confessions and the frequency of text message, but if they tasted borsch, clean at home, whether trousers with arrow are ironed.

Does such a measure for love seem unacceptable to you? But you have to get used to it. You can start to rearrange a little bit to change priorities - prepare dinner for your beloved, sew a hole on his jeans. You will feel that you are pleased to take care of your beloved. If not, then most likely you just are not ripe for a more stable and serious relationship. If you do a good job with caring for your beloved ones, you solve all the urgent domestic problems, then you are very far advanced and your feelings have passed the test of everyday life.

Remember that when you start caring for your man as a husband, you can demand the same from him - now he can’t get off with flowers and gentle words, you need concrete actions that make your life together more comfortable.

Rule number 39

The man "Take-get" and "Bring-give", or the natural female dependence on men

You feel totally dependent on your chosen one. It seems to you that with his appearance in your life you began to behave like a small spoiled child, because you felt that now you are under reliable protection and can relax, having completely trusted him. What does this degree of dependence on your chosen one testify to - about a strong and strong feeling or about your unhealthy egoism?

Nature created man and woman in such a way that they cannot do without each other. Representatives of different semi-constructions in such a way that they make up the halves of a whole. In the wake of Mother Nature, a woman needs a man who will do the hard physical work for her and will help her in fulfilling her main human mission - the continuation of the human race. Thus, women's dependence on men is programmed by nature itself and cannot be considered as something moronic.

But it so happens that this dependence goes over all the permissible boundaries - you begin to show the utmost degree of independence. It may seem to you that everything you are asking for is vital for you. You are without him as without hands. He is surely a faithful service that fulfills all your instructions - give, bring, help. You can not imagine how you will live without his help. You do not imagine that you yourself will have to carry heavy bags from the store and that you will have to go home by metro. And if something is broken, who can fix it?

You are replacing the notion of true love with the desire to receive direct benefit from your life satellite. Most likely in this case, pledged with the manifestation of unhealthy female egoism. It is naturally natural for you that your beloved should create all the necessary conditions for your comfort, you need help from him all, even then, when it would seem that you could manage yourself. You are forced to have a faithful and reliable servant, but not a beloved one. Remember that true love involves not only using the object of your passion to satisfy your essential needs, but also showing your care towards him, the desire to make him enjoyable.

To test the strength of your own feelings, complicate your own life: refuse constant help from your chosen one. Take some responsibility for yourself - try to do what was previously in his competence, for example, getting to the house by public transport, throwing out garbage, changing burned light bulb. Of course, this does not mean that you have to completely cope on your own - wear weights, repair a leaked faucet, etc., but you must be absolutely sure that you need it not just as a physical force, you should see in it not only plumbing, a carpenter and a porter in one person, but also a loved one.

Rule number 40

Beloved - a copy of the father, or the influence of mothers on your choice

You have noticed that your elect, both externally and in his psychological qualities, is very similar to your father. He has the same build and eye color, he is active and active like your parent, he prefers the same dishes, he even smells of the same perfume.

Very often, girls focus on their fathers in the selection of the groom. Most often, this orientation occurs on a conscious level. Girls are looking for a copy of their father if they want to duplicate the relationship of their parents. This is typical of children of successful families. There is nothing unnatural about it.

But there is another scenario: a rather strict and authoritarian mother can influence your choice. From early childhood, she engaged in shaping your image, almost without giving you the right voice: she chose your passion for music, although you really wanted to dance, she advised you to study law, although you wanted to study psychology, and it was she who insisted on the development of your relationship with your acquaintances’s son.

If the choice was made for you by your mother, then you should not immediately refuse him. To begin with, you need to determine whether the choice really materializes with your hopes and plans for the future, or whether your feelings are generated by the suggestion of your parent, who is confident that she will be able to build your happiness. To get started, try to understand what a man you would like to see next to you, try to draw your own portrait of an ideal husband. If you really dream that it looks like your father, then you are lucky and your opinion coincided maternal. But if you feel that you would like to associate your life with a completely different person, then do not be afraid to tell your mom and, above all, yourself. For example, dad is rather soft and docile, calm and executive, and you like determined, tough men, with a character. This is normal, because sometimes we do not want our fate to be a copy of the relationship between our parents, we want a different happiness. Let your mother scare your choice, let her ring the alarm and confirm that you are not a couple, but you have to remember that you are the decision maker, you have to choose what is bad for you and what is good for you. Never mind your wildest ideas, look for the man of your dreams, and nekopy of your father just because your mother wants it so much.

But do not rush into the pool with your head, secretly married by a long-haired biker, only so that mom understands that you want to live your way. Do not commit rash actions out of a sense of contradiction, which then will have to regret. Remember that at first you should study your chosen one well, so that you do not have to exclaim again: “As you were right, mother!”

Rule No. 41

Everything should be beautiful in it! or what if he does not possess all the qualities of a fairy-tale prince

Your admirer is far from ideal. He has long been seeking your reciprocity, but you have not yet been fully convinced of your feelings. It seems to you that he is not the prince you dreamed of — not so handsome, not so charming, not endowed with a special talent, and he doesn’t have a white horse. You like him, but you doubt that this is love ... How can you tell if you are in love with him?

Of course, in childhood, each girl draws in her imagination a portrait of her ideal husband, dreams of seeing everything beautiful. But it is often very difficult in life to pick up a real man, an ideal that meets all the necessary requirements. There is a fairly common stereotype of the ideal man — beautiful, intelligent, and rich. To be guided by this generally accepted standard, of course, you need to, but you should not focus on finding a person who has all of these qualities, otherwise you will find yourself alone.

You just need to look at your non-ideal chosen one, maybe you just can't see your dream in it? How not to be mistaken and not to reject the very man whom you were looking for life for, because he does not meet all the requirements of the generally accepted standard?

1. To begin with, set priorities that are comparable to your characteristics. What is the most important quality in a man for you? For example, you have a very high level of IQ, and you are already aiming for a doctorate, then pay attention to the intellectual potential of your chosen one. If you are a well-known fashion model and are used to appreciating your beauty, then, of course, you should pay more attention to male aesthetes who are able to admire your reputations endlessly. If your requirements coincide with the capabilities of your admirer, then perhaps before you is your destiny.

2. Look for the prospect. Do not reject your admirer, if he does not have all the necessary virtues. For example, you dream of marrying an inventor, and Romeo who is in love with you is just a student at a chemical engineering university, but he has every chance of turning science around and making his discovery in the future. Or it is not as rich as you would like, but it is hardworking and educated and can claim a good, well-paid job. In general, do not repeat the heroine's mistake from the movie “Moscow Doesn’t Believe in Tears”, which wanted to get everything at once: “To get married is also for the general.” Good husband  need to do the most. In general, look to your fan - maybe he has quite good development prospects and he will be able to meet your expectations.

3. “Beautiful, but self-willed” - say the people of color. They are often too spoiled by women's attention, they are used to being loved by everyone, admired by them. Remember that men's beauty is not the most important advantage. The true beauty is in the heart of your chosen one, in his feeling towards you. You differently look at the short and stout young manwho will conquer you with his charm and breadth of the soul. For you, he will be the most beautiful on earth.

In general, if you think that a man in love with you is not good enough, it doesn’t combine all the qualities of a fairy-tale prince, a hero of your novel, look at him not from the standpoint of entrenched stereotypes, but from your heart. And then you will realize that he is so rich, handsome and talented as you need.

Rule number 42

His ears are too big ... or why his appearance does not suit you

You began to notice some defects in the appearance of your chosen one, which you simply did not pay attention to before. You have never sought to communicate with handsome men, for you have always been more important than the inner qualities of your chosen one, but some detail does not suit you. Why?

Here is a vivid example of such hostility from the novel by L. Tolstoy “Anna Karenina”: the heroine could not understand why her husband’s ears were so ugly and how she had not noticed before. The author gives an explanation to the similar behavior of her heroine –one fell in love with another, and her husband - an obstacle that did not allow her to connect with her beloved, so she put out her inner habit to her husband’s appearance.

Such hostility caused by the appearance of your beloved, of course, may arise for a similar reason - you are more likely to have that tender and reverent feeling towards him. Lovingly brightens up all the flaws of your partner, and not only external ones. In your beloved, you, as a rule, see the ideal of a man; he is for you exactly what you dreamed of. If you truly love your chosen one, then you have to accept him as he is, moreover, you like him with all his flaws, abez them he would not be so good. You love him entirely: with a big nose, with a bald head, or a double chin.

If you suddenly began to notice irritation, which causes him to become bitter or a full body build, then most likely your feeling is already cold or not strong enough. You simply transfer your unfavorable attitude towards him to his appearance. You do not understand how you could fall in love with him if his ears or such a big nose stick out like that. Your negative reaction to his appearance can only be the beginning of the end. Further you will be irritated even more - hostility will be caused by his habits, lifestyle and manner of speaking. And only after a while, you will be able to admit to yourself that you are experiencing more of that quivering feeling of being in love with him beforehand.

Although there is a possibility that your dissatisfaction with its appearance may be the result of completely different processes. For example, you just started to meet, and your lover is quite suitable for you with all the inner qualities, but his style contradicts your idea of ​​a perfect lover: he, for example, has long hair, tied at the back of the head, and he wears only leather things. Calculate that you can not dress in this way, and it is simple that at 25, he looks ridiculous. In this case, you will have to make the maximum effort to make your lover look like a man of your dreams, not only in his internal characteristics, but also in appearance.

Rule No. 43

For two hares ... or How to make the right choice

You are at a loss - you have a hard choice. In your life there are two more than worthy men, and you cannot decide which of your admirers to give preference to. Each of them has its advantages, they are dear to you in their own way, but you no longer have the strength to deceive them. How to determine which of them you love more? How not to make a mistake in choosing?

Of course, if you still decide to make a choice in favor of one of your admirers, then it means that you are already thinking about more serious relationships that can become the beginning of a new family. Then arm yourself with female instincts with intuition - and off you go.

If you are confused and wondering which of them will give your heart, then use the old proven method, count their pros and cons. For example: Valera is clever, kind, and lazy. Nikita: beautiful, but short-sighted and without definite seizure.

Such an analysis of the advantages and disadvantages is very conditional, so look at some of the characteristics of your relationship. The length of your relationship plays an important role. Think carefully before you break a relationship with a loving and caring, proven partner for years and associate your destiny with an unfamiliar couple, about which you know almost nothing, which you didn’t even have time to admit. In choosing their own destiny, of course, it’s best to rely on the voice of the heart, which will always tell you who will make your happiness.

If you hesitate, it seems to you that you can not part with any of your admirers, each of them is dear to you in its own way, perhaps you feel that together they would be an ideal man, and each of them lacks something, then most likely your feelings for one of them cannot be called true love. You have not yet found your real life partner.

Making such a choice is actually very simple, you just need to listen to the voice of your heart. You can easily determine who your heart really belongs to, when you feel that you can no longer break on two fronts, your heart will tell you that you only want to be with someone you really love. This is not a lottery, not a game, the winner of which gets everything, the winning player remains unhappy for life. You just need to learn to listen to yourself and your heart, then you can easily recognize the true love.

Rule number 44

And talk? or about differences in the level of intelligence

You began to notice that the conversation with your beloved does not go beyond traditional “musi-pusi”: your elect usually silently listens to your thoughts about whether there is happiness in life, and when asked to evaluate your last poetic masterpiece, sighs: “Well, it seems normal ".

The case is quite common: one in para-intellectually developed and extraordinary. The other is ordinary and original. Is a happy ending of such a relationship possible? Unfortunately, practice has shown that in most cases, such couples quickly fall apart. And the reason for the gap - the discrepancy between the intellectual levels of partners. Most likely you are linked by unreal love, but just a passion, your relationship is based on physical attraction to each other. Your feelings face a crisis as soon as the period of first enthusiasm passes, as soon as you realize that your partner does not justify your need for intellectual conversation.

How to check whether your feelings are true from the point of view of intellectual compatibility: do you match each other on an intellectual level, or do you need to look for a more suitable intellectual sense of a partner? Just talk to him on different topics and find out how much he justifies your dreams of a smart and interesting life partner.

But you shouldn’t beat the drums ahead of time and worry that your feelings didn’t pass the test of intellectual strength, if on the first date your partner is speechless, you can’t say a word - this doesn’t mean that he is not developing eloquence from strong feeling. Desire to seem ridiculous and laid-back next to you only exacerbates his tongue-tied speech.

Do not try to spoil the relationship with your chosen one, if you think that you speak different languages ​​and can not understand each other. Very often, people with different mindsets do not immediately find a common language and a common topic for conversation. For example, your beloved, education technician, enthusiastically tells you about the latest technical innovation or his invention. You, as a typical humanist, just talk about the features of the artistic manner of Raphael or about a medieval adventure novel. Over time, two smart people will surely find topics for conversation.

Your feelings must be tested for intellectual strength. You choose a man for life, and, of course, an important role is played by the coincidence of your intellectual levels. You must be sure that your chosen one can be an interesting conversation partner for you. But if you are not used to each other, if your relations are just beginning to develop, then you should not break them because you have nothing to talk about. remember, that common topics for the conversation will appear with an increase in the statute of limitations of your relationship, to the extent that, as you will appear common acquaintances and interests.

Rule number 45

I still stare at others ... or is it acceptable to flirt with other men?

You began to notice that after you found your love, you didn’t lose interest in the opposite sex, you still appreciate men in public transport and flirt at work. How does this characterize your feeling?

Immediately, I note that if you do not go beyond reasonable limits, then everything is normal, do not worry: your habit of flirting and evaluating other men is not a cause for concern.

Women are no less than men able to appreciate the beauty of the representatives of the opposite sex. It is not a crime if you, having noticed a perfectly folded man, have kept your eyes on him a little longer than the permissible standard of decency.

Need to worry if you deliberately trying to attract the attention of sided men. As you know, everything is good in moderation, once you just look at the good-looking guy, but if you go with your darling and shoot your eyes to the right and left, if you turn to passers-by and answer with a smile at the smiling-sided men - this is an alarming signal. It may not just like your chosen one, but it will also indicate that you have not yet decided on the choice of your own one. With this kind of behavior, you kind of declare to the omnipotent that you are free and ready for acquaintance and further relations, and the gentleman walking next to you is another of those who sacrifice the spell. If you want to preserve your relationship, if you value your feelings, then try to break the habit of “shooting eyes”.

As for flirting, the most important thing here is not to cross the border. If you are in the habit of smiling to familiar men and kissing them when you meet - this behavior can not be prejudicial, unless your young man is not against these stinkers on your part. But if you allow yourself to wear fairly light and open clothes, if you constantly “hang” on your neck to your work colleagues, if your conversation doesn’t make unambiguous hints of possible intimacy with other men, then your reputation is also at risk, but your feelings in general. Your behavior can be assessed as defiant, which is intended to declare that you are not bound by any obligations, that your relationship with the current partner can be called free.

Remember that if you have a young man and you feel a sense of non-infinite, then there should not be a place in your heart for anyone else, there should not be a hint of the fact that this place is vacant. And if you constantly show attention to outsiders, then this may mean that you are simply not ready for serious relations.

Another danger: do not be too constrained in communicating with men, even if you are sure that you have found the love of all life, this does not mean at all that you have no right to talk to other representatives of the opposite sex, to smile at them and look implicitly in the eyes, fearing that consider it a hint. Just be a good man - and your loved one will appreciate it.

Rule number 46

What dreams do you have? or what does your subconscious say

You often dream about other men. You are afraid that the subconscious tells you that you made the wrong choice, that it gives out your secret and subconscious desires, that in fact you dream of another man.

If you often dream about love confessions from men, if in a dream you see that one of your co-workers is passionately kissing you on the lips or trying to incline the kintim bond, then you should not sound the alarm and declare loudly that you are mistaken . It is not necessary to interpret dreams so literally –the words reflect not only our subconscious desires, but also isstraha.

Such dreams can mean that you are afraid to change your beloved, it is possible that your feelings are not so strong, so the doubts visit you.

Usually the danger of betrayal in a dream comes from some kind of permanent, but faceless man, who personifies the opposite sex as a whole. If you dream of someone specific, someone you know, then this again does not mean one hundred percent that you dream exactly about him, that in your subconscious, he is firmly entrenched as a potential and desirable lover. Although this option also can not be denied. Sometimes similar dreams can mean that you are afraid of him. Perhaps in the life of this person constantly depresses you. He stands taller than you in the official ladder or surpasses you in intellectual and professional characteristics, and you are afraid of oppression and the manifestation of his grip on power. In a dream, this fear is expressed in the form of sexual harassment of this party as the highest degree of enslavement of a woman by a man.

An important role in assessing the value of sleep is played by your emotions. Try to remember what you experience during this dream — fear and horror or pleasure and joy. If you experience pleasure, then most likely this dream has a direct meaning, and vykhohite embody it in reality.

Remember that it is not always necessary to focus on the subconscious as the main criterion, because this is just our animal beginning, our instincts, and at the subconscious level you can be drawn to a person to whom you do not have any feelings. The main criterion is your heart and mind. Now, if they aspire and are drawn to the object of your dreams, then you really should consider this option. What if fate?

Rule number 47

I want to marry him! or About natural female need

You have already crossed the age line when a girl is considered a bride for marriage, and it seems to you that you urgently need to get married, otherwise you can remain an old maid. Or you just can not wait to be someone's wife, so you frantically looking for a candidate for a husband.

In most cases, the desire to marry your partner is a sure sign that you have become convinced of your love. As a rule, such a serious step is decided after a rather lengthy acquaintance and numerous tests of their feelings. It is common that a woman does not want to lose precious time and dreams of only one thing - to quickly get married. She, like a hungry tigress, pounces on her victims, inclining them to marriage. Such haste at least frightens anyone - and here she is again alone, in a broken trough. Having caught his breath and having gone through another setback, she rejoined the battle, she was not discouraged, because she was sure that her prince was somewhere else.

In this case, your desire to marry dominates the desire to find your love. You may not have a really strong feeling for your partner, but just dream of a stamp in your passport. How to determine whether your desire to marry your chosen one is a proof of your love, or is it simply based on your fear of remaining an old maid?

Before you decide on such a responsible step, you must be absolutely sure of your feeling for the future spouse. The best test and proof of your sincerity is, of course, time. The longer you met and tested the sincerity of each other's feelings, the stronger your love became. It is impossible to call the optimal time interval for which you can absolutely sure to make sure your sincerity and sincerity of your partner. Someone after a few years of dating still doubts that his companion is fate, and someone understands this in a few weeks.

But time is not the most important judge. You can determine the truth of your feeling on other grounds as well: how comfortable you are with your chosen one, whether you long for each other, care about him, whether you have retained the tender feeling of tenderness and passion that you felt for him at first.

Most importantly, remember that the desire to marry should not dominate in you. Although there is nothing reprehensible in it, witnessing is a natural female need. There is a tacit agreement between the sexes: women search for men with the aim of marriage, and men try in every way to conceal themselves. It happened in society that a single woman is considered to be a worried one (since no one takes her, it means that something is wrong in her), but a single man, on the contrary, had a completely different attitude — he was able to dodge the charms of cunning temptresses — well done .

Remember that in the first place you should have a desire to find your destiny, and not just get married. You should not do such an important and responsible step with the bay-floundering, you must be sure of the strength of your feelings for your chosen one.

Rule number 48

I'm too young for marriage! or what to do if you are not ready for a serious relationship

You have repeatedly received from your faithful a marriage proposal. He is in love with you and insists that you make up his happiness. But for some reason you do not agree, saying that it is too early for you to get married.

Your youth is certainly a good reason to delay the registration of your relationship, but it is possible that your refusal has deeper reasons.

First, you may not really be ready for a serious relationship: you are not ready to move to a new, more serious stage in the relationship, you have not yet been completely convinced of your feelings. It is possible that you are confident in your love and the love of your partner, but you will just stop to start an independent adult life together, you think you are not ready for marriage, then it is quite reasonable to wait, but you have to gradually prepare for the transition to a new stage in a relationship. lifestyle changes, give up your old ways of spending leisure time - for example, regular meetings with friends, trips to discos, without which you can not live, try to substitute for quieter entertainment. Remember that marriage is not a constant celebration of love and youth, it is also a great responsibility for the person who is next to you. To test your readiness for marriage - try to live together, then you will know for sure if you are ready for such a serious head. , or you have not yet come out of that age, when it gives you greater pleasure to walk and enjoy, and not to take care of your husband.

Perhaps you refuse to tie up your destinies for another reason: you simply do not feel for your chosen one a real and anxious feeling of love. It is possible that you deliberately maintain constant relations with your reliable and trusted partner, but he is not rich, unaware and undervalued, therefore he is not suitable for the role of your husband. He is just a fallback for you if you suddenly can't find your destiny.

You are actually deceiving him: you do not want to tie your fate with him forever and at the same time keep him close to you, do not give him the opportunity to find his own happiness. If you really want to look for a more suitable option for you, then do not fool him in the head - release him, tell him the truth, reveal to him your true motives. It is possible that he will be able to recover from the blow delivered by you and with time will also be happy, but if you leave him when he simply doesn’t live without you, then you will break his heart and cause his total disappointment in women of the opposite sex.

Rule number 49

I want a child only from him! or irrefutable evidence

You have a dream about your firstborn, you already think about how you name it, you dream of how you will have fun and interesting life for three, you are sure that the appearance of a baby will change your life and reinforce your feelings, will be a guarantee your love

The birth of a child is a very important and responsible step in the life of a woman. If you want to give birth to your beloved child, it means that your feelings for you are not strong enough, because from the point of view of the global mission of women, the continuation of the race is the most important task of nature that it needs to perform. If you feel that your chosen one is suitable for the role of the father of your unborn child, then your feelings for him can be called truly strong.

Ask him if he would like a child, by chance, when he is not ready for this issue, for example, after seeing young parents strolling around in the park. By his first reaction to your question, you will determine how he relates to a similar idea. Usually, men who are opposed to the appearance of the baby have not yet been convinced of their feelings for you, they understand that if you have children, it will automatically bring him to justice, it will be a signal that he should become your husband, which he does not want or fears. Do not worry - give him time, and perhaps he will change his attitude to the possible replenishment.

Before you start a child, enlist the support of the future dad.

Curious who he would like more - a boy or a girl, make sure that he sincerely wants to continue his city, and not just in words. If your lover will enthusiastically tell how he will teach his future son to swim, then he really should believe, if he will not answer your questions reluctantly, then he is not quite sincere with you and not yet ready to become a dad.

The desire to have a child from your chosen one is one hundred percent proof of the strength of your feelings for him. This is a very serious step in your life, which means that you are ready to create your own independent family. If you are ready for responsibility, which will fall on your shoulders together with raising a child, if you go on this consciously, then you can safely proceed to the fulfillment of a human mission on earth.

CONCLUSION

If everything that you have heard and seen in the evidence of the love of your chosen one is not enough for you, then probably only the latest invention can help you - the last word of technology. In Romania, they invented something like a love detector that can determine the sincerity of the feelings of your chosen one. By pulse and other physiological parameters, scientists can determine whether your chosen one loves you or pretends. So I advise everyone who doubts to buy a ticket to Romania and quickly test your loved one for strength.

But seriously: you still think that you are not loved enough, you are sure that this is only a temporary phenomenon and for some time this feeling will become dull, like your previous feelings. Remember that one thing is to acquire and achieve strong love, and quite another is to preserve it; for this, much more effort is needed.

Trust men, but always be alert. After all, they can have their own mercenary goals, and behind the seeming innocence can hide vileness and deceit. In everything, rely on your own intuition, you must have a cold mind in making decisions and a warm heart that will tell you that you are in love.

By the way, the Romanian inventor was unable to determine the degree of sincerity of women and came to the conclusion that they are creatures irrational and their feelings cannot be calculated with the help of technical inventions.

If you are at a crossroads and are not sure of the strength of your feelings, then do not rush to take premature steps, which you will later regret. Do not marry out of the fear that you will no longer have such an opportunity, do not leave your beloved if you think that he is far from your ideal. Of course, it is not forbidden to dream to the best and worthy man, the main thing is that these fantasies do not go beyond what is reasonable, if you ask for more and more people, then the fate of your grandmother's quotation about the Goldfish can apprehend you. Remember that fate is treacherous and your dreams can become your rock - you will sit at the broken trough.

Tell your friends:

“How does he treat me?” Is a question that worries every girl, starting with. Generally speaking, the attitude of a man to a woman is a very multifaceted topic. In this article I would like to touch on one of its aspects - how to determine the sincerity of the words of a man when you already know at least a little. Does what he tells you really is on his mind?

How to distinguish sincere compliment  from rough flattery or, deserve your location. There is such a method in practical psychology, and it is simple enough for mastering. It is only necessary to take a little more careful attention to the words that you hear from your fan.

A man can start. And a woman is often “led” to this colorful stream of amenities, relaxes and loses her watchfulness, imagining that this man is already subdued to her.

This often happens with women who experience hunger for male attention. Perhaps they have not met with anyone for a long time, have not heard compliments and words of approval. Sometimes such situations have not the most pleasant consequences - a woman turns out to be deceived. The principle “oh, it's not difficult to deceive me, it works, I myself am happy to be deceived”.

How to behave if you want to check the sincerity of a man?

From adoption to clarification


The model of literate behavior is this: the first reaction to any, even the most awkward compliment, is, of course, joy, appreciation. A sincere (key word!) Demonstration that you really enjoy hearing and that you would like to hear it more often.

Then, to determine what is really behind these pleasant words, you need to ask a special clarifying question. Only, of course, not in the forehead, but very carefully and subtly. Try to ask the man in what circumstances, in his opinion, you showed yourself exactly the way he says: “delicately feeling”, “good girl”, “kind”, “spiritual” and so on (depending on the situation).

When did he have time to notice these qualities of yours, to tell you about them now? It is desirable that he gave some real example, a real situation that you can also remember. Where did he pay attention to it, when, under what circumstances?

Subtly hint to the man, try to carefully transfer the conversation into the mainstream of these memories. And, of course, no interrogations.

The truth is hidden in the answer


Pay special attention  to answer. If a specific story is behind a compliment or words of approval, events that a man can remember and tell you about them, it means that he is watching you, he is really attentive to you. And this means that you are not indifferent to him. By the reaction of your companion, you can understand whether to build a relationship with him further.

But the reaction may be different. If a man falls into a stupor on your clarifying question, transfers the conversation to another topic, stubbornly rejecting your hints, or answers something in the style: “Why do you need to know this! Well, yes, I think you're kind. I immediately understood it, ”- it is worth thinking. Perhaps he is just trying to impress or get something from you. Lovers fooling around and seekers of frivolous relationships do just that often.

Of course, there may be other reasons. For example, a man still doesn’t know you enough, he is shy, doesn’t like to talk too much. In any case, this is a signal to slow down the relationship, take a pause. Wait until the compliments begin to sound sincere, with confirmation, examples. Time will tell how this man will be determined - whether the communication will continue with you or just disappear from your life without delivering any frustration or disappointment.

Show reciprocity


The clarification rule, by the way, also applies to back side. Think, because you yourself, when you begin to praise a man, say something pleasant to him ("you are such a strong, wonderful, real man! I am with you as if behind a stone wall"), you also probably want some concrete actions from him in your direction - maybe help, maybe support in solving your problem. And he also has the right not to believe you. Especially if he had a negative relationship experience before you, and he was already burned by insincere, prudent women.

Such a man will be wary of your praise, compliments and encouragement. And if, in addition to pleasant words, you will give some specific examples (“but remember how you helped me out when the car broke down,” “only you could answer this impudent phone like a man”), then he will believe you much rather He will see that you are also sincere, that you are interested in his life, he is interesting as a person, and not just as a "money earner" or "problem solver."

So the rule is simple: when you want to say words of praise or a compliment, say specific things, not just beautiful phrases. And then your relationship will develop, there will be understanding and sincerity in them, without which no happy and strong family union can exist.

Vadim Kurkin

It is not necessary to specifically check the feelings of a man, as sometimes in life there are situations that indicate that a man has feelings for you or does not. But you don’t need to wear pink glasses either: be sure to look closely at your chosen one, because your future depends on it! Worth remembering famous phrase, uttered by Sharon Stone "Only women can imitate an orgasm, men imitate a whole relationship." It turns out that a man plays with feelings, but do you really want to participate in such a game?

Check the feelings of your chosen one will help the tips below.

The real feelings of a man appear as follows:

  • You do not have the feeling that you lack male love. In return, you get as much love from a man as you give away.
  • A man has a desire to take care of you. If you are sick, he will look after you, he will feel sorry for you.
  • The man is jealous.
  • A man is important to know your opinion. If there is a dispute with other persons, most likely it will be on your side. It will make concessions, since it is important for him that you are satisfied.
  • A man will always be interested in what and how you live, what you do in his absence, what you care about, what you are interested in. However, it is not necessary for his chosen one to talk about how the day was spent in detail; men do not like this “confession”.
  • A man will not only please your positive sideshe will be touched even by your shortcomings.
  • A man loves to kiss you, and will do it on any occasion.
  • A man confesses his love, although not immediately, which indicates that he had been thinking about recognition for a long time.
  • A man constantly looks at you, has a great desire to touch you, to have sex (although most often all this manifests itself only during the first months of our acquaintance).
  • Such a man will sign his SMS messages, letters with phrases that say about love - “I love you”, “I kiss”, “with love”.
  • A man is afraid of losing you.

Contentious feelings of men, manifested as:

  • You have a feeling that your chosen one does not allow you in all parts of your life. It seems to you that he is hiding something, keeps back. The man does not tell you about ex girls, although you already told him about your past love. Such behavior of a man may indicate that he does not trust you.
  • A man is not jealous at all.
  • A man doesn’t care about your opinion. His decision, even if it concerns both and you disagree with him, will be final.
  • A man does not care about you, even if you really need help.
  • A man does not introduce you to his friends, or always takes you and drags everywhere - on fishing, on football, in the bar.
  • Man irritate your antics.
  • Already on the second date, or even at the end of the first meeting, he is flooded with compliments and speaks of his love for you.

A man does not experience anything to you if:

  • The man has never expressed his feelings for you. You have not heard from him even warm phrases, nor speaking of declarations of love.
  • The man does not hint at intimate relationships, even if you have been dating for a long time. From his side in the direction of your body there is no encroachment!

If you cannot understand whether your chosen one loves you, ask a friend to help you, because as you know, from the side you know best. Let the girlfriend appreciate the feelings of the man towards you. To do this, you can go to a cafe together (you can choose any joint time for the meeting, the main thing is that you are with your chosen one, and your friend comes with her). A friend, of course, will not say for sure whether your chosen one has love for you, but she will be able to assess whether he treats you well. A friend will tell you directly if she sees signs of disrespect for your personality. If a man does not respect you, then love from such a man, you just will not wait.

When starting a new relationship with a gentleman, be vigilant and then you will never miss joyful or disturbing signs that tell a man of feelings for you!