Why the guy disappears without explanation. The man disappears, then appears again. After a long relationship
Men "disappear" at different stages of relationships: soon after the first intimacy, after a year, and sometimes several years later. life together. The separation leaves a deep impression and does not allow to find happiness with a new partner, as the effect of incompleteness remains. What are the most likely explanations?
At the initial stage
- Demanding When a man is constantly being asked for gifts, ideal treatment, is controlled, forced to give up bad habits, he endures not for long.
- Obsession From constant pressure, pursuit, calls, messages, any man will get tired quickly. Strong sex is nice when a woman pays attention to him, but obsession scares - the initiative in the relationship should come from him (or at least think so).
- Bitchiness The guys open the bitch do not like, even very beautiful. Alone it is allowed, but not in public. Even a slight rudeness of a girl will make a man wonder whether to continue the relationship. Since it’s problematic to negotiate with stinkers, it’s easier to leave without saying goodbye or explaining anything.
- Fall curtain. At first you try to look gorgeous, watch your appearance and only appear in “perfect condition”. Later he sees that everything is not so good: they are scary without make-up, and at home go to stretched workouts, and go to the country to dig a garden. The charm disappears at one moment, the feelings fade away, it disappears without clarifying the relationship.
- Windy In the first months of the relationship, the man will be frightened off by his partner's inclination to flirt, her accessibility, the desire to cause jealousy. Rather, he will disappear and try to find himself someone who will become alone.
After the first proximity
- Did not like. Don't blame yourself right away. Perhaps he is so bad lover that he couldn’t excite you enough, didn’t arouse desire, couldn’t think of anything interesting.
- Disgraced. Worried, did not work, was ashamed. Communicate no longer wants, not to recall his own failure.
- Got his and went for a walk on. You got a classic man for one night. He won, took advantage, started looking for the next one. Standard "Casanova" with which normal, long-term relationship is impossible.
- He has a girlfriend or wife. You may have been the victim of a man who wanted to take revenge on his regular partner or "try" another option.
After a long relationship
The most difficult situation to explain is the disappearance of a man after several months or years of relationships. All the same can be applied to the situation when you were officially married.
- Tired of life. Men are not particularly hardy in everyday matters and need novelty. Household fatigue accumulates for a long time, but in one moment it breaks through, and the beloved disappears. Went to look for new sensations, passion, vivid sex.
- Accumulated secret offenses. Once you say “you are a loser” or close in meaning, and he will remember. It will take time, will meet another, more cautious in words. Ponder and go to her.
- The pressure of relatives and interested outsiders. Perhaps you did not like his relatives, close friends. He will secretly discuss with them whether to continue the relationship. Make a decision alone and disappear.
- Caught treason. Not all men decide on the scandal, having learned about infidelity beloved. Some pack up and leave without saying anything.
- Himself fell in love or changed. Why fall under the hot hand if you found yourself new love? It’s mean to go away, but calmly and without nerves.
- Hoped that you change, but failed. There are men starting a relationship with an “advance”. He hoped that you: lose weight, learn to cook and restore perfect order, become more sophisticated in sex and so on. Time passed, hopes were not justified.
- You have changed, but not for the better. He fell in love with a tidy, looking after himself, looking after a figure, trouble-free. Then the benefits were gradually lost, and the new ones (emotional intimacy, comfort, joint wealth, common interests) did not appear.
- Always lived for 2 families. The situation is paradoxical, but not infrequent. Peculiar to "travelers", working "on a rotational basis", "long-distance drivers".
- Run away from responsibility. Did not calculate the strength or did not know that everything goes so far. He wanted to take another walk, did not dare to tie life to marriage now. Understood - not to avoid scandal, abuse and humiliation. Decided to disappear on the sly.
- Checks feelings. And the most incredible option - wants to see how you react, to finally understand, "you deserve it or not." Although such an explanation more often looks like a hastily invented excuse.
... And then appears
The partner returns if he “checked the feelings”, thought it over and decided on the next step in the relationship, became disillusioned with his mistress, tired of suffering from nostalgia and pleasant memories. To take a man back or not - can not be said for sure. Listen to the mind and think for the future.
My greetings to you, dear!
Why do men disappear from relationships without giving a reason? This most often happens at the very beginning of a relationship, but sometimes especially “responsible” people manage to evaporate even from the family. A special case - when a man disappears on the eve of holidays, or after you ask him for a gift or help with something. Who is to blame and what to do?
The man took the phone number and disappeared immediately after dating
Option history.
He saw you in a passing bus, ran the whole block after you, went to the bus at the bus stop and, greatly embarrassed, asked for your phone number because he liked you a lot and the girl of his dreams in general. It was sober and adequate.
You have agreed that he will call in the evening, and ... 2 weeks have passed since then, and neither a bell nor a tiny text message has been sent from him.
What the devil took the number, I ask? Furious!
Why he could not call:
he just got sick. It happens that the romantic mood passes, the man switches to his life and forgets about this little adventure. Perhaps he just missed waiting for something, while he was spending his free evening and had a little fun with you, not planning to call from the beginning. Or maybe even he is too lazy to get involved in a new relationship, especially if there is at least some alternative;
he made a mistake in writing the phone number, or the number was not saved. Or maybe the phone was suicide immediately after they met, or it was stolen. Oops, no luck this time. Pretty unlikely situation. And if he really liked you very much, he will most likely find a way to meet you;
he is married either in a permanent relationship. He could not restrain the impulse and met you, but then he thought it over and decided not to run into relations on the side. Either he hid your number far away to call you when the opportunity arises and the wife leaves somewhere. While waiting, I forgot how you look and called the one that I could remember (and this is for the best);
he met you for an argument, as proof he needed to present your phone number, or your number - a trophy in itself, which you can boast to your friends;
he learns to achieve goals, or set himself the task - to meet with the ten liked women, while not being ashamed and not screw it up. Well, or he was just interested in the process and flirting, he checked his “masculinity” and if he had not lost his fighting grip, but it would be strange not to take the numbers, and therefore he took it. Or maybe he was a pikaper with quirks peculiar to him;
after meeting you, I met another “girl of my dreams,” and forgot to think about you, because fresh emotions were interrupted by a little forgotten;
when he talked, he realized that he was wrong with the conclusions about the “dream”, but it was just inconvenient to not ask for a phone number, or he took it just in case. Such an understanding may come to him some time after the conversation;
he needed urgent sex, but you refused to go with him to where he invited (at least in a cafe to start), or he even realized when communicating that it would not be so easy with you. He took your number for the sake of decency, maybe even walked you home, and then ran off to look for a more affordable option, and completely forgot about you;
he was disappointed that you so easily gave him the phone, without having to go through some kind of quest like "on Saturday by 6 pm I will come to dance in a fitness club on Soviet 64, if you want, you can see me there." Some men do not look for easy ways, they want to overcome obstacles and they are only interested in accessible and even inaccessible girls, others immediately lose interest. They have a kind of understanding of ease of accessibility: she gave the number right away - it means a so-so girl, surely nobody needs it;
he died or there was a force majeure (this sometimes happens, though rarely).
In general, the reason can be anything, from a simple change of mood to a personal Armageddon. Anyway, if he doesn't call, he just doesn't want to do it. If not dead, of course.
What to do?
Nothing. Leave him the right to be what he wants, and to do with his life as he sees fit. Very often a man gets acquainted, knowing full well that all this will not continue, and you have nothing to do with it. You should not get involved in self-digging and look for the cause in yourself, because in the overwhelming majority of cases, as you noticed, the matter lies in the man and his intentions, and not in you.
In the end, this is just another acquaintance, which a free girl in search can have (and should be!) A dozen a day. Why give this too much importance? Go about your business, communicate and enjoy life. Do not be driven. It will be necessary - will find and call. The less you remember him, the faster you forget. In a week-month-year, you don’t remember exactly about him.
The man suddenly disappeared at the beginning of the relationship
You started a relationship, everything seemed fine, maybe even you managed to make friends not only with hearts, but also with organisms. And then bang - you realize that for the whole week it was washed away like water. Either it merged gradually, rang less and less, and the time between meetings lasted more and more, and in the end stopped giving signs of life. You feel crushed, and thoughts in your head swarm in a circle: “Why? What did I do wrong? How to fix everything? ”
Alas, not all men have enough spirit to even write a text message that it's all over between you. Not to mention a personal meeting. And is this meeting necessary? Relations no longer exist, and what a difference, how he told you about it. And if no one said and just disappeared without explanation?
In this case, women most often begin to blame themselves. And in vain.
With the disappearance at the beginning of a relationship, the causes may be different:
1. He died or something tragic happened to him. Again, it is possible. This is a very unlikely event, so I highly recommend not calling him, asking if he is all right, and if he has not given up the last spirit. Moreover, it is not worth podkarauvlivat under the door of his apartment, to "just talk and dot the ё."
If you have been in a relationship for some time and are very worried about his life, ask your mutual acquaintances once.
If they are not there and there is no one to find out about its existence, then you can easily check it yourself. Wait for him near work or at home. The main thing - do it from afar and do not fall into the eyes of him or your common acquaintances! And then he will think too much about himself, or even worse - he will feel like a victim of an abnormal hunter and will hardly ever appear.
In a pinch, you can also write him a message: “Hello, how are you?” Delivered, but there is no answer, and it still shines online regularly? So point number 2.
2. He just doesn't like you. Maybe they liked it initially, but disliked it, he saw that you had different interests, views on life and goals, and you were not on the way. Or he started dating you out of boredom, wondering if he liked you. Do women really don’t have such a thing, so that, out of boredom, they can indulge in a bit of a relationship with someone from those who are not too interesting and with whom they don’t plan anything long lasting? Boredom has passed, and the need for a relationship with you has disappeared. How can he explain this? Therefore prefers to evaporate silently.
3. He realized that he won you, got what he wanted, and looks after the next prey, or is already running around with might and main. Often this happens after sex, which most often men hunt. Hence, sex was the goal, or was accidental, or not at all the same as a man would like. And here, in fact, this is the same item number two, in which he just does not like you.
4. He was afraid of responsibility, of your serious conversations and intentions, or even realized that he did not want to spend his life with you. The same item number 2.
5. He has a period of doubt when he himself wants to decide whether to continue the relationship with you. Very similar to item number 2, but with unimportant nuances.
6. He reconciled with the former. Trite, because it happens often. Especially if he started a relationship with you, to forget her, or to spite her, or to be jealous. The effect has been achieved, your services are no longer needed ...
7. He is tired of your tantrums, demands and the removal of brains, especially in public. For lack of gratitude and criticism, he feels used. And his patience is exhausted.
8. He has problems or obstruction at work. That is, the fear of losing you fades into the background, because it is not so great in comparison with his problem.
9. On the nose holidays: your birthday, New Year, February 14, March 8. I feel sorry for the gift for you. After the holidays will be announced. Either you yourself asked him for a gift or help with something, and he was gone. This is exactly item number 2.
It would seem that the reason should be obvious to the woman herself. But when love literally climbs out of the ears, all this no longer seems so logical. I want to hope for the best. Especially if mentally married him and gave birth to three children. And he takes and brazenly merges ... I do not want to believe that this is the end. But nothing else remains.
What to do?
If he disappeared after the first sex - nothing. He is not interested in developing relationships, he will have to go through this. Any sms and calls - the humiliation of your dignity.
If it disappeared before the first sex - nothing more. It is easy to forget the man with whom the woman did not sleep. Sooner or later weed out of my head, leaving no trace. It is unlikely that it will take more than a few months, and in a couple of years you will not be able to remember about it, even if you want.
If disappeared after a couple of months of relationship - surprising, but nothing again. It makes no sense to terrorize him with calls, “accidentally” come across his eyes, ask for forgiveness, offer help in solving problems, eternal friendship or meetings for sex. He may agree, but in his eyes you will lose the last value. What if she disagrees, what will you be?
Even if your tantrums were to blame for everything, draw conclusions about changing your behavior in life, wait a couple of weeks, write “Hello, how are you?” And wait for the reaction. If he wants to communicate with you and meet - try not to repeat his destructive behavior. If his reaction is sluggish or not, continue searching for the man of your dreams. Give yourself the right to make a mistake! After all, no one is perfect, and there is nothing to make excessive demands on yourself. After all, you are not a gold bar to please everyone, and you who are on your way are not obliged to love you. Leave the right of others to choose whether they like you or not. And this is not your problem. You, too, do not like everything.
And this "podpadun" himself will appear, if he wants. And he will probably do it no sooner than you really decide to let him go inside you.
In any case, even if you want to return it - you first need a pause in communication for 2-3 weeks, so that he will forget the bad things about your relationship, the resentment subsided, and he missed all the good things that happened between you. Problems are not eternal, miss - call. But do not get bored - draw your own conclusions. By the way, I plan to write an article about how to correctly return a man. so as not to miss it.
Why no explanation?
It would seem, well, tell me humanly that you do not want to continue, and be done with it. A woman will not suffer in obscurity. But no. And why is that?
The main reason for this is fear. Suddenly you will start to make trouble, sort things out, blame him for all sins, tear off his phone, guard at the door, threaten, or even break his car or his face. And it seems that he hid his head in the sand, you see - everything will settle down by itself, it will survive and calm down.
Though his hopes look stupid, yet it’s pointless to blame him for them. After all, women often do even worse than he can imagine in the worst dream. If all women calmly reacted to the offer to leave, would not reproach him and did not cry, did not try to get reasons from him, would not persuade him to change his mind and stay where he doesn’t want to stay, then it is quite possible he would not disappear English
That is, if women knew their worth and behaved with dignity. Does not want - then does not want, this is his decision and choice, it is impossible to be suitable for everyone, and you are good enough to arrange your personal life happily and without it. If all women had so much self-respect and self-confidence, the world would be completely different, full of responsible men. I wrote about the benefits of female dignity in family happiness.
Also, the reason may be the feeling of the navel of Earth He is sure that everyone around him thinks and feels the same as he does. In his head, he built a logical argument for why your relationship has no future, and is absolutely sure that everything is clear to you too, this is more than logical!
He does not take into account that this is only logical for him, and you have your own feelings about the relationship with him, and for all other reasons, too. Needless to say, women sin no less often. For example, when we are sure that this is logical - after six months of a relationship, buy the most expensive ring, for which you only have enough money, invite to a restaurant, stand on one knee and, shedding tears of love and admiration, make a woman an offer.
And he may have his own logic, when, to whom and how to make an offer. The woman is offended and leaves him, but he does not even understand why he was abandoned.
Or the woman thinks that it is logical and natural to help her when she puffs and tears, drags bags from the store, or does the dishes late at night when everyone is asleep. And this is not logical for a man - well, since she copes and does not ask for help, it means she does not need it. If a man does not need help - he will not ask her, and offer to help him - to humiliate him, to show him that he is weak and unable to cope with it.
Therefore, he judges by himself, and a woman by himself. Everyone is sure that in the head of the other the same thoughts as he has. That the other is well aware of what they want from him, but does not do this out of spite, specifically, in order to offend harder. This is how two adult small children, who have not yet realized where one person ends and another begins, break relationships and lives of each other.
Another option may be a period of doubt. Many male trainers claim that a man must have a period when he decides for himself whether he wants to be with this woman. They came together too close, and he needed to move away to start, to see her at some distance and feel attracted. And it would be better if this period began at the beginning of a relationship, and not in a deep marriage.
A woman, as a rule, does not have such a period. Therefore, he could not even explain to her what was happening, no matter how he tried. Often he cannot even explain to himself why he wants to push off from her. If she is not hysterical and just takes care of her own affairs, then most likely he will be bored and be attracted again.
The man disappeared and appeared, how to behave
For whatever reason, the man did not disappear, if he appeared - it means he has a desire to be with you. Strong or not - as long as he himself does not know. Therefore, it is important to competent woman's behavior.
First you need to throw aside the desire to take revenge and send away, fall in love and leave him, get him by all means and come what may. Better analyze his qualities, his past attitude towards you, listen to yourself - would you like to spend your life with this person? Are you interested in chatting with him? Are you inspired by his goals? Do you feel deeply that anyway, sooner or later you will part with him, because he does not suit you? Do not you just lead on his beautiful appearance? To help you decide, I specifically wrote.
Usually inside a woman there are answers to these questions, but emotions drown out everything. And then she either realizes that he is as she needs, but pushes him away from resentment, or vice versa, realizes that he is not very interesting and not suitable for her, but hunting excitement and offended self-esteem make him fight for him, losing his time in vain.
If you don’t need him, don’t start this relationship again. It is better to finish everything now, until you are very attached. Then it will be harder to tear it off, but you still have to, since it is not a pair for you.
If you do not know him well and have not yet managed to understand whether you need it or not, or are sure that you need it, you will need all your composure, pride and patience. React to his appearance calmly.
You should not joyfully throw him into the arms - for him it will be a sign that you were waiting for him and he can disappear and appear when he pleases, and you are quite happy to be an alternate aerodrome and always gladly accept him.
At the same time, you should not roll out his offenses, paint your sufferings that you experienced without him, as you did without him. From feelings of guilt, he can escape again. Perhaps he had that very period of doubt, and he survived it.
You shouldn’t blame him for it, best of all just explain your feelings: “I didn’t know what to think, it was like you no longer want our relationship, and I tuned in to the worst and tried to come to terms with the idea that we are all over. Therefore, I now need to think things over to see if I want to continue. ”
And let her try to earn your favor. Only his courtship, gifts and attention do not take with a sense of insulted pride and arrogance, but as for the first time. It was as if he had not missed, but nevertheless rolled back a step and now tries to conquer you anew. Old new fan. And you have to decide whether he deserves a second attempt or not.
If you did everything right, he won you and you had a great relationship, but then he suddenly or smoothly disappeared a second time - your relationship ended. He has very big doubts about you. Too big to build a reliable family with him. So, it does not suit you, because it does not love enough. Or it is very afraid of responsibility, and this also means that he is not a couple to you.
The man disappears, then appears again
I won't say anything new - he doesn't like you enough to stop at you and stay. Another woman he may or may not - the conclusion is the same.
It happens when you are in some way and like a man, but in some things you don’t. So he rushes in the hope of finding a more suitable option. Sometimes he misses some of your suitable qualities for him, at such moments he calls and writes. If he does not show signs of life, it means that during these moments he most likely thinks about your unsuitable qualities, or about the suitable qualities of some other woman. Therefore, it is pointless to torture him with calls - at this moment he is focused on the bad, and you push him away even more.
That is, in fact, he does not really need you. I specifically call qualities “suitable for him” and “unsuitable”, and do not call it your “good” and “bad” qualities. So that you do not suddenly rushed to blame yourself and reshape these qualities to please him. If you try to adapt to it, to love what he loves, to stop loving what he doesn’t like - you lose yourself, and then you don’t like either yourself or him, because he will become bored. Your self-esteem will drop to zero, you will constantly look for what else to change in such a “curve” in order to please it more. And without consistently high self-esteem, healthy relationships are impossible.
It is much more interesting to find someone who needs exactly your kit. My consulting experience shows that for every commodity there is a merchant who can appreciate it. One considers the mind of a woman a disadvantage, the other - a virtue. One needs a soft and submissive, the other - able to firmly defend their opinions and desires. One wants a woman who is able to calmly negotiate, another - a brawler who with her cries causes a surge of emotions in him and makes him relive the entire rainbow of feelings. It is impossible to please everyone at once, it’s better to search a little longer and find your own ideal.
It turns out that such a relationship, when a man “figaro here - figaro there” - has no prospects. It is impossible to adapt to it, but not to adapt - it will run away again. In a pinch, you can correct your frank flaws, which you yourself consider as such. For example, squabbles, rudeness, inadequate jealousy, untidyness and others like them - to work on these qualities in any case will not hurt, if only for yourself, not for him. But only if you want. After all, in any case, you will be able to find your connoisseur, if you search well.
In such a relationship, “neither there nor here”, a woman to death is tied to a man. It is not surprising - he arranges such emotional swings for her that you just rock! A woman thinks such a man is amazing because she shakes him ten points out of nine. That from love and happiness, then from insult and hatred. She feels "finally truly alive." And it is so sweet and pleasant to wait for his call, and then he will crawl before her on her knees, ask for forgiveness and say that she is the best in the world and he realized that he cannot live without her. They will have a sweet time of love, seasoned with the bitterness of waiting for a new separation, and then everything will be repeated.
The rest of the cases are relegated to the tenth plan, because nothing can compare with these sensations. In his head, only he and the anticipation of his next antics, a keen desire to get him with giblets, and it does not matter how suitable he is. Vlyapatsya in this relationship can be for many years.
Moreover, the dependence is not so much on the man, he himself may not be needed, in the depths of his soul, many women understand this. That they will part with him sooner or later, when their relations more or less run out, because they have a very different views for life and for to a large extent boring with each other.
Dependence here is more on these emotions and an irresistible desire to achieve his love. Many of them say: "I am not used to losing, I have invested too much into it, I cannot afford to lose, and I will get it at any cost." Especially if he is handsome. They are investing more and more, and therefore they are becoming more attached. There is too much at stake to be so easy to take and refuse. And the further, the worse. Just like in a casino.
The secret of getting rid of dependence is to accept, still and take and refuse. If a man disappeared more than once, then he just does not suit you. After all, the main criterion of a suitable man is that he loves you and wants to be with you. And this one loves, does not love, then again twenty-five. Is it possible to build a family with this? If you hope that the stamp in the passport and the presence of children will stop it, then you are mistaken.
Accept the fact that you have invested in this relationship too much, and understand that you still have a lot left. You will not invest anything more in this relationship, and henceforth you will invest only where you are truly welcome.
Find other sources of pleasure and emotion. During the relationship with him, you all abandoned, because nothing could match the sharpness of sensations with your unpromising novel. Old hobbies and hobbies do not bring more joy - look for new ones that bring. Replace this dependence with another, only more useful and accessible - for example, from healthy lifestyle life or your own chic appearance. Only this time, remember that everything is good in moderation, do not be obsessed and leave a place in life for other things and hobbies.
The man disappeared from the family or long cohabitation
Everything was good, the family was created (or in the nearest future), perhaps, there are already children. And then, for no apparent reason, the man slammed the door and disappeared without explanation. Is it possible?
Fortunately, rarely. This can only happen if in reality everything was not so good. But the wife chose the position of an ostrich. She hid her head in the sand and did not want to notice the problems. Because I did not know how to solve them, and I was afraid that everything would collapse. “A thin world is better than a good quarrel, it can somehow resolve itself,” she hoped. Did not resolve ...
This could be caused by scandals, insults and offenses that were accumulating and accumulating, and one day he realized that he was either in a noose or in freedom. Because otherwise it will explode in such a way that it will collect scraps within a radius of one hundred kilometers. Self-preservation instinct makes him run. It can be understood, because the ability to negotiate, to hear the other and correctly communicate his thought was not taught. Yes, and who was taught?
The reason may also be his love for another woman who set an ultimatum, he could not withstand the tension, and he didn’t have enough courage to look into your eyes. As well as long-term grievances with claims, a woman can not help but notice that her husband fell in love with another. Therefore, here too, it cannot be said that he disappeared for no reason at all. The woman understood what was happening, but was afraid to ask questions. And if you really did not notice, then perhaps about such a relationship, you can say "we are fine"? In the family there is no closeness and understanding of what happens to another person. Not spouses, and roommates in the common area. When there is intimacy - the change in the mood of another is felt almost instantly.
Throwing a family once and for all is not so easy. Parents and friends will make him think again and come back (if you have a good relationship with them, of course). Most likely, he will miss the children. Yes, and get a divorce, too, would not hurt to create other relationships. Therefore, to disappear from the family without a trace few people get.
At last
If men often disappear from your life, then it is likely that the reason is in you. Maybe you want to marry every next man from the first minute, and you behave yourself too annoyingly? Or is your nature very hysterical and would it be worth working with you? The reasons may be many, the situation for each individual.
Do not become attached to the man too quickly, let everything go on as usual. Leave him the right to change his life when he wants. And do not forget to give yourself such a right. Stop thinking about whether you are suitable for him and what he wants from you. It is better to check whether it suits you (for the one that I already mentioned).
And most importantly - stop blaming yourself! Self-assessment as a 100 kg weight is easy to drop and difficult to lift. If he has not forgotten the former - this does not mean that you are worse, just his heart is closed to others. If he has disliked something in you - it does not mean that you are bad, you simply do not approach HIM. After all, if it is important for you that a man, for example, loves to travel and does not smoke, then smoking male homebodies are not at all bad, they just do not suit YOU. And there is no tragedy in this, because it is impossible to be good and suitable for all. Look for your man who will be delighted with your qualities.
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Sometimes men prefer to disappear without explanation. And no matter how long your relationship lasted - two weeks or two years, this act seems mean-spirited, cowardly and irresponsible. Having appeared in such a situation, any woman will start to guess, analyze her actions and look for explanations to the man’s act.
Here are the most common motives that will be the answer to a difficult question - why do men disappear without explanation?
1. He does not want to take responsibility
When a novel comes to a standstill, someone has to say the last goodbye, thereby taking responsibility for the end of the relationship. Unfortunately, many men are trivially afraid of responsibility. At first, they delay the decisive conversation, and then, without gaining strength, simply disappear.
2. He is afraid of explanations
If a single phrase was enough to break the relationship - “it's all over between us”, the men would cease to disappear without explanation. But since after this phrase a woman probably wants to know the reason for this decision, tries to talk and, perhaps, starts to reproach or even cry, men prefer to leave in English. Thus, they protect their nerves.
3. He feels like a victim
It may seem to you that your relationship is full of love and understanding. But it is possible that the man thinks a little differently. By their nature, the stronger sex is quite straightforward, but there are exceptions when a man, feeling like a victim, is waiting for explanations and apologies from you. And, considering himself offended, the man goes underground, sincerely believing that you are the first to start a crucial conversation.
4. He is afraid of accusations.
If the initiator of the break in relations is a man, he becomes a priori the position of the culprit. And when a man does not have the courage to admit his mistake or explain the reason for his decision, he prefers to leave quietly and not say goodbye.
5. It seems to him that you yourself understand everything.
Crises are an inevitable phenomenon for long-term relationships. But if the crisis is prolonged, and people continue to be together by inertia, sooner or later someone will prefer to leave. A woman in this situation, of course, will carefully think up a farewell speech and will try to do everything not to hurt the feelings of her partner. But men think differently. They just do not understand why we need unnecessary talk and showdown, when and so everything is clear?
6. He can not make decisions
Men who leave without explanation, most often differ in moral weakness. If he is not used to taking responsibility and making independent decisions, one should not expect noble acts from him even at the moment of separation. Saying simple farewell is not as easy as it sounds. For this you need to have a share of decisiveness and prudence, which is not everyone.
7. He is afraid of scandals.
In men, a break in relations is associated with shouts, tears, smashing dishes and other elements of scandal. It is no secret that men do not like this terribly. Sometimes the fear of explanations is so strong that because of her man is ready to sacrifice moral principles and rules of decency.
8. He has another woman
If the motive for separation is the presence of another woman, who, moreover, insists that the man should rather break off the relationship with you, it will be difficult for him to explain his act. First, in this case, the man feels guilty, and secondly, he just does not know what to say to you.
9. Your relationship does not develop as he planned.
Sometimes, starting a relationship, men do not plan anything serious. If initially a man needed only a light, non-binding novel, but at some point he felt that you were hoping for something more, it is possible that he would simply hasten to retreat from the “dangerous” zone.
10. You were his “backup” option.
Alas, sometimes men act cruelly. Situations where men start relationships are not uncommon, but at the same time they keep within sight of another, more inaccessible object. The reason for such an act is banal to the point of nausea: if it fails to catch a “crane in the sky”, it will remain with a “bird in the hand”. If the crane falls from heaven to earth, he will not hesitate to leave a bird. And the explanations in this scheme are clearly superfluous.
11. He is trying to get out of the relationship winner
Selfishness of some men does not allow them to stoop to explanations, admitting their mistakes and apologies. It seems to them that leaving quietly and not saying goodbye is an act of a real man, while a banal showdown is the lot of the weak.
12. He does not know how to cope with difficult situations.
For the most part, men simply do not know how to go beautifully. They are afraid of our reaction, they do not want to hurt us and simply do not know how to explain their actions. And if the true reason for the gap is unpleasant for you, for example, you do not suit him in an intimate life, you demand a lot from him or do not watch yourself enough, the man will think that it is better to leave without explanation than to make you more painful.
A stranger's soul is darkness. Indeed, in most cases, men leave without explanation because of their weakness, lack of education and unwillingness to take responsibility. But do not exclude the presence of force majeure. Maybe something serious has happened in a man's life, something that you cannot even imagine. If you are sure that the man is in order, do not wind yourself with unnecessary emotions. If a man left in this way, be glad that you did not become his wife or the mother of his children. When a man cannot muster the courage to beautifully end a relationship, one can hardly expect any noble deeds from him in the future.
