How to hide love
Not all love is mutual and happy, sometimes it does forbidden. When the situation or advice does not allow achieving reciprocity from the object of adoration, the question arises, “How to hide love?”
A student falls in love with a young teacher, a boss falls in love with a subordinate, a bachelor falls in love with a friend's wife - but you never know what other "wrong" love can be ?! No one is safe from the "arrows of Cupid". But if such love has arisen, a desire is born to hide it. Although this is not an easy task.
Love is very hard to hide! And even more so from observant, wise and experienced people.
Especially hard to hide non-verbal manifestations of feelings. It is difficult to force yourself not to blush, to breathe more evenly, to remove trembling in the knees, it is absolutely impossible to control such a non-verbal sign of love as dilated pupils and others.
The same signs of love that mind controlled and amenable to volitional regulation (thoughts, words, actions, deeds) can be hidden.
Before looking for an answer to the question of how to hide falling in love, you need to clarify some other questions for yourself.
The answer to this question may force you to change your mind about the need to hide feelings. But it is not easy to answer it, and above all because it is very easy to confuse falling in love with love.
If there was not just a flash of passion, but a strong, deep feeling developed, is it worth hiding it? Not every love (even if it is forbidden!) and even more so such a wonderful feeling as love must be concealed in oneself!
Sometimes suppressing and hiding feelings is tantamount to hindering your own happiness! But society has come up with a lot of vowels and unspoken taboos that make certain types of love affairs impossible.
For some acts of a sexual nature, criminal punishment is rightfully due, for some others, the unfortunate lover will only be condemned by the crowd.
If a person wants to be happy in love, he should pay less attention to “what will people say?”, but at the same time remember that the end cannot justify immoral means and personal freedom ends where the rights and freedoms of other people begin.
Why did you want to hide your love?
This question will help you understand yourself and how best to act in order to hide passion.
Possible reasons to hide feelings:
- Guessing that a nice person will not reciprocate.
- The knowledge that the person you like is already in a relationship or the fact that the lover himself has a relationship.
- The assumption that it will not work to build a relationship, even if sympathy is mutual, since this kind of connection will cause mental pain or other harm to third parties.
- The understanding that relatives and the environment will not accept the chosen one / chosen one will hinder the development of relations.
- The realization that falling in love is not serious, the object of adoration is considered only as a means of satisfying sexual desire, and simply “use” his conscience does not allow.
- Relations of this kind are prohibited by the law of the state, the charter of the organization, the internal regulations of the institution and other documents that have legal force. For example, in some companies, office romance is prohibited, and “guilty” employees are fired.
The reasons may be different, but their awareness helps to treat forbidden love not as a problem, but as a task that needs to be solved.
What are the expected positive and negative consequences?
- If you hide love?
- If not hide it?
The answers to these questions will help predict the consequences of the decision and, possibly, change it.
For clarity, it is better to write the answers to these questions in two columns, then evaluate and compare. In which direction will the preponderance of positive answers occur? In what negative?
There can be many possible options for the consequences of hiding feelings, all of them cannot be counted. But perhaps the most likely negative is psychological discomfort from the inability to achieve the desired. And if the love is strong - mental anguish, suffering that will have to be endured.
It is better to realize the consequences of making responsible decisions, so that later you do not feel offended by fate and be more confident in yourself.
To be able to hide love, you need know what are its manifestations and hide them (read the article about exactly what signs of falling in love with men and women will have to be hidden). But, as always, it is important not to go to extremes.
Experiencing love no need to pretend the opposite feeling- hatred. It is wrong to show disdain, dislike, or any other negative emotion towards a likable subject. So the boys at school, pulling the girls' pigtails, think that they will hide sympathy behind aggressive actions. But any, even negative attention is attention, a sign that a person is "unevenly breathing."
Absolutely avoiding any contact with the object of attraction is also not worth it. If every time you put on a mask of feigned indifference, do not enter into a conversation, do not answer phone calls and avoid meetings, on the contrary, you can compromise yourself very much.
No need to specifically avoid meetings, but you shouldn't look for them either. If there is a choice, for example, to pass by the object of adoration or another way, it is better to choose the second option.
You should try to behave with a nice person calm and even, as with an acquaintance or friend for whom there are no strong feelings.
Neutral attitude and courteous formal communication within the bounds of decency (even better, when only “on business”) will help to hide love.
In a conversation with a nice person no need:
- touch on personal topics, especially ask about personal;
- try to establish bodily contact (touch the arm, shoulder, try to hug, and so on);
- look into the eyes for a long time or constantly look down;
- smile too much;
- too happy to communicate and express readiness to talk for as long as you like;
- drag out the conversation and show unwillingness to stop it;
- try to emphasize your talents, virtues, abilities, other "pluses";
- persistently offer their help and support;
- preen, straighten hair, clothes;
- make voice, look, movements more beautiful, sexy, masculine / feminine;
- to enter the intimate and personal zones of communication, that is, to approach a person closer than half a meter, the best option is 1 meter (at this distance, it is also difficult to discern body signals due to the chemistry of love).
In principle, with a nice person is better talk less, also do not need to look at him when he is in sight, but is busy with something.
It is also not necessary to provide unsolicited help and support, organize pleasant surprises, give expensive or “talking” gifts and souvenirs.
Worthy of special mention chatting in Internet. Today, a like on social networks is considered a sure sign of sympathy, so you have to stop endlessly liking and writing laudatory comments about the relative appearance or other merits of the desired person. You should also limit correspondence on the Internet.
